Tuesday, 9 April 2019

Mar v Vege



It's a question as old as the hills; Marmite or Vegemite? I have both.

Of course, there is only one answer; it HAS to be Marmite.

Vegemite tastes as if it's been made with burnt dust, mixed with chocolate waste and sump oil. It has an unpleasant texture, and an even more unpleasant dull colour. Its flavour (if indeed that word is even applicable) is akin to 'gastronomic failure'; an experiment that went horribly wrong, and was instantly abandoned; other than as a filler for cracked septic tanks. And as for its 'aroma', it is not dissimilar to something found under shoes.

Marmite on the other hand, is Ambrosia, that infamous food of the Gods. Angels are credited with the original recipe, and Her Majesty herself has given it her seal of approval. It is the food that develops intelligence, strength, and willpower. It has won wars and conquered the world. It was the very foundation of the Empire. 

As for its taste, Marmite has been described as 'elixir'. A mythical creation that calls men from the wild to worship at the altar of toast. A breakfast flavour so powerful that fortunes have been made simply on recalling its lingering aroma.

Marmite moments from history: The England team ate marmite before their 1966 World Cup match, making them invincible. Ian Botham famously kept a jar in his pocket, and would dip his finger into the nectar before sending Viv Richards back to the pavilion. Tim Berners-Lee was never without several jars whilst developing his WWW. Cap't Webb rubbed his body with the miracle paste before diving into the channel. Buzz Aldrin took it to the moon. Stanley Matthews used it to replace dubbin on his boots. Etc, etc.

If you still wish to know why Vegemite was banished to the other side of the world, it was because Rolf Harris was reared on it!

66 comments:

Margaret Butterworth said...

Very amusing - but I find both inedible! I'm told, however, that they are good for preventing mosquito bites because the mozzies can tell you've been eating the stuff.

Jules said...

I've never tried either of them. Clearly, I'm missing out.

Cro Magnon said...

I've heard that too, and as I'm very rarely bitten by Mozzies, it could be true. However, it only works with Marmite!

Cro Magnon said...

Only from one! I wouldn't bother with Vegemite.

cumbrian said...

From which we deduce that Cro is an avid Marmite fan.

Yael said...

I love Marmite, I can even find it here in a shop sometimes.

Cro Magnon said...

Is there any other Yeast extract worthy of the name?

Cro Magnon said...

I've just had some for my breakfast. I left the 'other one' in the cupboard.

Cathy said...

We're happy little Vegemites,
As bright as bright can be.
We all enjoy our Vegemite
For Breakfast, Lunch and Tea.

And that goes for me as well!
They are both acquired tastes - I know which one I prefer:)

Cro Magnon said...

Now, let me guess where you live Cathy. Could it be down under in Rolf Harris land by any chance?

Jomo said...

Marmite for ever. I love it slathered on hot buttered toast there is nothing more comforting.I add it to home made soups stews and casseroles delicious.As a child we had an open fire and Dad would make us toast on the toasting fork which hung from the fireplace and marmite on the toast. Happy days. My dog used to love a bit of my marmite toast. Love to Billy.

New World said...

I have never had either of them.

Anonymous said...

Smear it on exposed skin very thickly.

Anonymous said...

Marmite is inedible and how very dare you dis our own salty, yeasty black breakfast spread made from beer slops.

Carol Caldwell said...

I too love marmite. On buttered toast it has a savoury and salty taste that lingers and makes you lick your lips. There is nothing else like it.

Anonymous said...

Yes, but she was born in the UK.

Cro Magnon said...

We'll have to fight this out on the Cricket Pitch.

Cro Magnon said...

Billy had some of mine this morning! He's already got a liking for it. Sensible boy.

Cro Magnon said...

I don't blame you for not having had Vegemite; but Marmite, shame on you!

Cro Magnon said...

I can see that you Aussies are going to gang-up on me.

Cro Magnon said...

I agree. Wonderful stuff.

Cro Magnon said...

Or flick a lump of it at the Mozzie.

Frances said...

Have you ever tried it in a sandwich with sliced, hot ,hard boiled egg? Or on toast with scrambled egg on top? Or stirred into baked beans on toast? Or in a cucumber sandwich? Perhaps you can tell.....I like it!

Cro Magnon said...

I've certainly matched it with cucumber in a sandwich; none of the others though. Maybe it's time to experiment.

potty said...

I have a large jar in the pantry it was openned and now I find that the yellow plastic top has seized up. I am waiting for a visitor with strong grip to get me back inside.

Pipistrello said...

Oh, I had to check the date ... I thought this was an April Fool's posting! Your passion is misdirected M. Cro, Vegemite is the only Yeast Extract worth its salt!!

Pipistrello said...

I don't know if this tale is apocryphal but when Vegemite was first invented there was a public call out for a name for this Marmite cousin and a strong contender was Parwill!

gz said...

Vecon?

gz said...

We're backing him!! We much prefer the taste of Vegemite, but either will do. They are both obviously Love it or Hate it!! Interestingly only low salt Vegemite has B12 added, as does Marnite

gz said...

It was between 1928 and 1935..the history of both makes an interesting read

Cro Magnon said...

Hot water should do the job. We don't want you to die of Marmite Malnutricion.

Cro Magnon said...

I might have proposed Tarmac; and I might have won!

As another matter of interest, I was once given a jar of Marmite that came from Dubai. It tasted very strange; I'm sure it was FAKE.

Cro Magnon said...

Never 'erd ov it.

Dc said...

Marmite all the way for me and DS although DDiL and hubby loathe it. Vegemite is simply disgusting!

Cro Magnon said...

Of course. There really is no comparison. How the Aussies can tolerate their poor imitation; I really don't know.

JayCee said...

The husband likes a thin coating of Marmite on his cheese on toast but I am not quite so keen. Although I do add a generous spoonful to homemade soups. Adds a punch :)

Cro Magnon said...

On very cold mornings, I sometimes have a spoonful stirred into boiled water, as a very warming drink. It has so many uses.

New World said...

A popular post. Says something, not sure what.

crafty cat corner said...

Agreed, Marmite always for us.
Briony
x

Penny said...

Marmite disgusting. Vegemite is the best. Guess where I live.

Pipistrello said...

hahaha, yes Tarmac may have won!! An American friend who tried it once declared it to taste like Tarrr, in their fruity accent.

Given that we were lead to believe as kids that Vegemite was a by-product of the beer industry, you have to wonder what that jar was made from in a teetotal country! Had to be counterfeit, for sure.

Pipistrello said...

Oh Rachel, it's a passionate topic! There's really no grey area between Marmite and Vegemite devotion.

Margaret Butterworth said...

"The product that was to become Marmite was invented during the late 19th century when German scientist Justus von Liebig discovered that brewer's yeast could be concentrated, bottled and eaten.[3][4] During 1902, the Marmite Food Extract Company was formed in Burton upon Trent, Staffordshire, England with Marmite as its main product and Burton as the site of the first factory."
(Wikipedia). Also discussed in one of M Portillo's railway journeys to Burton on Trent>

Cro Magnon said...

Thank you Pipistrello. Rachel has never experienced the pleasure of Marmite.

Cro Magnon said...

Vegemite is banned in Brighton!

Cro Magnon said...

I think you got that the wrong way around Penny.

Cro Magnon said...

Marmite German? I can't believe it.

New World said...

Clearly it is Pip. I remember Cro writing about it before and it always gets the same reaction. I like Bovril.

Frances said...

I used to love Bovril. I have forgotten about it for years..must get some. In the centre of Leicester, where I was born and bred, there used to be a colourful light flashing advert high on a building by the clock tower. I loved it as a child. Must go on street view and see if it is still there!

Frances said...

It isn't ! Completely different building .

Cro Magnon said...

Lots of people stopped buying Bovril after the 'mad-cow' scare. I certainly did.

Carol Caldwell said...

I also like to spread marmite on toast then top with cheese the melt under the grill.

I also find that you mustn't screw the lid down too much or it's difficult to open.

And one more fact, I have a little, beautiful, black bantam, hen (a serama) who I named Marmite.

New World said...

You might as well have given up paté at the same time.

Cro Magnon said...

Huh.... jamais!

Cro Magnon said...

I recently had a few black Marans, they would have ideally been named Marmite 1, Marmite 2, Marmite 3, etc.

The Weaver of Grass said...

I have periods when I love it and then I go off it for a while. Then I put the residue in the jar I am using into soups and stews - tastes just as good there.

Cro Magnon said...

I don't think I've NOT had a jar in the cupboard since I've lived by myself. To me it's as essential as salt and pepper.

Jo in Auckland said...

I'm with you Cro...when we moved to NZ we couldn't initially get Marmite and when the relatives visited they brought a huge jar for us to use. Now we can by Marmite... but because there is already a NZ Marmite; equally as disgusting as Vegemite, it had to be re labelled as Ourmate. Totally ridiculous but at least I get my fix!

Jo in Auckland

Jo in Auckland said...

Gah! Buy Marmite, not by Marmite.

Jo in Auckland

Frugal in Derbyshire said...

Marmite every day for me. My daughter bought me a jar with my name on it at Christmas. I think I will refill it when it is empty. The gorgeous black stuff is made just a few miles from her in Burton on Trent.

Sol said...

I prefer marmite. But if you put them side by side, vegemite is lighter in colour and seems to have grainy bits it in, like crystalised salt. I think something must happen to it in transport to the UK. Marmite on ryvita is really quite nice

Poppy Q said...

I can't stand either.

Cro Magnon said...

I used to import my Marmite to France, but now it's readily available. What will happen post-Brexit is anyone's guess!

Cro Magnon said...

How did she get your name on it? A special edition? Maybe one could get a franchise from Marmite to personalise jars.... you'd make a fortune!

Cro Magnon said...

Thank you for reminding me; I must buy Ryvita. I'll add it to my shopping list NOW.

Cro Magnon said...

A neutral end to these comments! Thank you.

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