Thursday, 30 June 2022
The 3 month garden.
I shall not go into details but some time ago a gang of very well organised Asian men were grooming young vulnerable white girls for sex in the Northern town of Rochdale.
These mostly under-age girls were ferried around and used as sex-slaves; having been plied with drink and drugs. This was a seriously nasty gang, and it involved many men.
The so-called ringleader of the gang was 51 year old Abdul Aziz (below) who was sentenced to 9 years in prison back in 2012.
Wednesday, 29 June 2022
Tuesday, 28 June 2022
Ana Kasparian I Don't Care About Your Religion
Monday, 27 June 2022
Sunday, 26 June 2022
Some time ago my sister in NZ sent me details of her DNA analysis, which, logically, I presume would be the exactly same as mine.
How accurate these things are I don't know, but I have no reason to doubt their findings, other than one particular bit which I shall try to ignore.
Saturday, 25 June 2022
Friday, 24 June 2022
Julien Clerc - Partir (2002)
Thursday, 23 June 2022
Some favourite Mondegreens.
Perhaps I should explain the origin of the 'Mondegreen' for those who may not know. In the Scottish ballad 'The Bonny Earl of Murray' there's a line which states 'They lay'd him on the green' which was misheard as 'Lady Mondegreen'. The Mondegreen was born.
I've always liked Jane Asher's personal example. She received a letter addressed to Mr J Nasher, which opened Dear Mr Nasher. She rather liked it, so never told the Company of their mistake.
There is the popular school hymn which most children sing as 'Gladly my cross-eyed Bear'.
The tune 'A Merry Conceit' was often referred to as 'American Seat'.
A Scottish 'County surveyor' was once referred to as The Countess of Ayr'.
There is a story of a typist's copy being checked only to find that instead of 'juxtaposition' she had typed 'Jockstrap position'.
Imagine receiving an invitation to a 'Haddock-Stirring Committee' when you expected to have been invited to an 'ad-hoc steering committee'.
And finally I did hear that someone once called Directory Enquiries to find the phone number of London's famous 'Wig and Pen Club', only to be told that there was no Pen Club in Wigan.
I'm sure you have your favourites, so let's hear a few more (not from songs please)!
Wednesday, 22 June 2022
How Strikes Work.
Tuesday, 21 June 2022
Shock! Horror! There's a mustard shortage in France.
Monday, 20 June 2022
A few things from the Garden.
Sunday, 19 June 2022
What is your ideal home location?
With the current heatwave, I got to thinking (yet again) about the perfect place to live. Here are my simple criteria.
1. A range of temperatures between a minimum of 10 C (Winter), and a maximum of 25 C (Summer).
2. Fertile soil with rainfall at night only.
3. Reasonably priced vernacular housing, with sensible planning regulations, but little bureaucracy.
4. Within easy reach of water; preferably a coral atoll.
5. An attractive and friendly native population.
6. Zero crime rate.
7. Easy access to fresh vegetables, fruit, meat, fish, and red wine.
8. No snakes or mosquitos.
9. Reliable internet access.
10. No other UK ex-pats.
Sadly there is no online site where I can process these desires to discover where my Shangri-La can be found. Any suggestions would be welcome.
Saturday, 18 June 2022
June is bustin out all over - Carousel 1956
Friday, 17 June 2022
I turn my back.....
Thursday, 16 June 2022
There are two very good reasons to go mushrooming as early in the morning as possible. Firstly there's the likelihood that no-one has already visited my 'patch' before me, and secondly it becomes far too hot later.
Yesterday morning I left the house at about 6.30 am (5.30 am UK time). It was already nearly 20 C and very humid.
I got what I'd wanted, and Lady M photographed my return (below).
These are Girolles, a very fragrant and delicious, pale orange/yellow mushroom. Normally I would make a lunchtime omelette, but I think I'll fry these tonight, incorporate some cream and white wine, and serve them tossed into spaghetti. It makes a lovely dish that is usually only ever eaten by those who gather their own mushrooms.
Wednesday, 15 June 2022
Spot the difference
Tuesday, 14 June 2022
Phew, it's a stinker!
Monday, 13 June 2022
La Bicyclette (Adrien Moignard & Antoine Boyer)
Sunday, 12 June 2022
Saturday, 11 June 2022
Friday, 10 June 2022
Bugg*r; I've bin nabbed!
Thursday, 9 June 2022
The Next Tory Leader?
Wednesday, 8 June 2022
Poem for a Hermit
All I desire is a comfortable chair
an ancient home
a warm hearth
and a black and white dog.
I have no need for a mobile phone
a wide screen TV
an X Box
a super-fast computer
a car that can go from 0 to 60 in 5 seconds
a virtual reality headset
or an E-Car or Scooter.
But, hang on
I hear my phone 'ping'
I have messages on WhatsApp
my laptop is calling me
my answerphone is flashing
the scammers are pestering
everyone wants a bit of me
I can no longer resist
I've lost control.
© Cro Magnon 2022
Tuesday, 7 June 2022
Now that the jubilee is behind us, wouldn't it be timely if H M The Queen declared Prince Charles to become Prince Regent?
One has to face the facts that The Queen, at 96, is no longer able to fulfil all her official obligations. She has mobility and pain problems, and at her age she deserves a rest.
Charles's duties would be slightly increased, but he has proved himself perfectly capable. He will soon be King, so an interim period as Regent would serve the country well. Now that he has a stable and hard-working consort, they could stand-in for H M The Queen seamlessly; although I imagine that Camilla would remain very much in the background.
I await The Palace to declare what I am suggesting a.s.a.p.
Monday, 6 June 2022
Things we've been missing.
Sunday, 5 June 2022
Saturday, 4 June 2022
A local Farm.
Next the family well, which was fed from rain from the roof of the house.
Friday, 3 June 2022
Did I ever mention how much I hate the colour orange?
It's my least favourite colour. I would never wear orange clothes, buy an orange carpet, or hang orange curtains.
Nor, frankly would I use Orange.fr for my French internet connection if there was a viable alternative.
The British telecom Co 'Vodaphone' is a world leader, and after its acquisition of the German Co Mannesmann they were ordered by Brussels to sell the telecoms Co 'Orange'. France jumped in, and France Telecom bought Orange in around year 2000. Brussels didn't like the idea of a UK telecoms Co being so all-powerful.
Whilst back in the UK recently, from Oct 2021 to May 2022, my internet connection (BT) didn't fail once. I've been back in France now for almost a week and already the bloody connection is at best 'hit-n-miss'. A huge area hereabouts was recently without the net for a whole day.
As I write it very erratic. On, off, on, off. It's ridiculous. This morning we've had some distant flashes of lightning and a few even more distant rumblings of thunder. AT ONCE our connection fails. What the hell is wrong with these people? They couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewery.
My hatred of all things orange, especially Orange.fr, has been enhanced.