Monday 8 November 2010

Dieting for Dummies.

BEFORE (Genuine authenticated photo)

AFTER: (2 Weeks later: Genuine authenticated photo)

I have a glut of spectacular cabbages up at Haddock's, and we've been eating them regularly in our lunchtime soup. It reminded me that a while back there was a fad for a 'Cabbage Soup Diet', so I asked Lady Magnon if we were both suddenly to become extremely slim as a result of our lunches; surprisingly she replied 'No'.

Dieting, and dieting books, are lucrative buisness. Therefore I would like to announce the publication of the following.....

Cro Magnon's 'Stop Stuffing Your Face With Pies, Easy Diet Book'. And it's sister book Cro Magnon's 'The Eat Far Less Fat and You'll Lose Weight Diet'.

As you can see by the GENUINE illustrations above, I have myself tested these revolutionary diets, and these GENUINE photos prove that they are effective.

So, if you are morbidly obese, send as much money as you can afford, and the 2 above mentioned MIRACLE (easy to follow) diet books will be forwarded to you asap under plain cover.

GENUINE photos courtesy of Dr Lady Magnon.


  1. lol love it lol how true Cro all we see on TV adds is diet,diet and people do and then eat eat eat....someone had a great sense of business didn't they and they saw suckers at every turn,not everyone taught their kids everything in especially you can eat all the things you love as long as it is in small amounts..O'h well back to the cabbages lol...

  2. Wow, that's amazing. My cheque is in the post!

  3. Your next best selling book could be about penis enlargement using the same, miracle technique.

  4. Hee-hee-hee!! (love Tom's comment)

  5. Am morbidly broke but think your diet books could bring in a fortune, Cro. Best of luck !!

  6. It's a great idea, only, are you sure that isn't a trick photo or something? Oh never mind, you foreigners would never try to swindle us Yanks. Checks in the mail!


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