I really thought my luck had changed. Originally I thought I'd found a 'tenner', but when I saw that in fact it was a MILLION POUND NOTE, I was ecstatic.
I was walking through the churchyard with Billy and there it was, staring up at me like like a gift from above. My hopes were soon dashed, however, when I realised it was just a bit of 'Hell and Damnation' advertising.
On the back it told me that I wouldn't go to 'heaven' if I'd ever lied, stolen anything, or lusted.
Well that's that then. No Million quid, and no place in 'heaven'. I'm downhearted and despondent.
A million poxes on them for getting your hopes up. Finding even a tenner would have put a spring in your step. Hell and Damnation on Them.
ReplyDeleteOh, and Happy St George's Day.
'There'll always be an England
While there's a country lane
Wherever there's a cottage small
Beside a field of grain....
I have just read that The Church has changed the date of St George's Day to the 28th, so like 99.9% of people; you may have it wrong. Something to do with being too near Easter. Nothing is sacred!!!
DeleteNever mind, you would be stressed out trying to spend that million pounds - think of all the begging letters you'd get!
ReplyDeleteWhen the UK becomes the 52nd (or whatever number) American state, thanks to the demented acquisitive idiots over there, we probably won't even be able to celebrate St. George's Day.
I thought we weren't allowed to mention it anyway, as it might upset our immigrants.
DeleteAt least your coffee stays hot in hell, and we will all be there together.
ReplyDeleteAlways look on the bright side of life; hot Coffee sounds good!
DeleteThe Bank of Eternity? I wonder if they pay interest?
ReplyDeleteI'd probably find that they'd just closed down.
DeleteIt's spooky how your face appears on the £1m banknote. Is Lady Magnon - posing as Britannia - on the reverse side?
ReplyDeleteI didn't think anyone would notice. Yes, Lady M is on the back in her bikini.
DeleteTake the money Cro.
ReplyDeleteI would have, but 'the church' wouldn't let me!
DeleteWhat a lark. On one side a windfall of cash and the other a less-than-ideal prediction.
ReplyDeleteRotten luck, wasn't it.
DeleteSave me a seat in hell, then, if you get there first! LOL!! :) I'll be looking for all my atheist blogger buddies on arrival. :)
ReplyDeleteMy place has now definitely been booked.
Delete