Monday 24 October 2022

The West Wing.


We are about to embark on a total restoration project of the West Wing. The work is long overdue, and we have searched-out and engaged a team of specialist workers to complete the task.

The building, although vernacular, is not 'listed' so no complicated permissions were required, nor have we consulted the authorities on the use of classic colours, or choice of materials.

The roof will come off, and a new sympathetic one installed. Regarding the interior, the original surface of the walls will be carefully preserved and restored to the original 1960's splendour if deemed necessary. The delightful 60-year-old patina of the oil-stained floor will of course remain untouched. Any endangered wildlife living within, or on, the building will remain undisturbed.


N.B. Throughout the project, if any 'Just Stop Oil' protesters should glue themselves to anywhere near where work is in progress, they will respectfully be left in situ and covered with a heavy tarpaulin. In their own best interests no Police will be called-in, and their right to peaceful protest will be respected (for up to one month).

28 comments:

  1. This post is so funny, how lovely to restore your mansion's west wing to its original 1960s splendor.

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  2. I hope you document the whole process.

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  3. If you're really lucky someome might come and respray the door for you.....

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    1. I'd rather they just left a few unopened cans of Heinz Tomato Soup.

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  4. You could helpfully offer any protesters more glue in case their's becomes unstuck!

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  5. Have you considered using a 1960s period psychedelic paint theme?

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  6. Uncover any protestors if it starts to rain, they could use the rinse. Looking forward to progress reports.

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    1. And a squirt of detergent to help with the wash. Good idea!

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  7. The West Wing could be converted into an artist's studio, a seedy massage parlour or a lock-up for illicit goods - such as duty free tobacco and wine from France.

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    1. Someone amusingly suggested I use the space to store the Compact Royce. Honestly, some people do have the weirdest ideas!

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    2. A car in a garage? Ha! Ha! Ha! That's ridiculous!

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  8. Oil stain floor, eh, could be a source of immense joy if degreased and painted in a marbled end sheets style.

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    1. The specialist roofing executives have just arrived; Burley Burt, Jim the Jemmy, and Dodgy Dave. My oldest told Lady M that the boss was called Rufus, he wasn't amused.

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  9. Always good to have a plan in case of eventualities. Historic preservation work has its risks! Cheers

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    Replies
    1. They haven't fallen through the roof yet, but there's time.

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  10. So many go into renovation with no real planning or forethought. You've got a good workable plan here that honors the history of your palace. I hope that your restoration experts work more quickly than, say, the restoration experts who worked on Big Ben.

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    1. They've just come from doing my son's roof, and they are really getting on with it. Very efficient.

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  11. It seems you have the "A" team working on your project. Have fun. If the protesters arrive, I'd love to see you give them a piece of your mind.

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    1. No sign of any as yet, but I think the lads would sort them out if they did come.

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  12. I chuckled through the post and then the comments..you are so sinister. :)

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    1. It was all done by 5pm, and no self-gluers. Hooray.

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  13. If their glue holds, just paint over them and make them part of the decor.

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    Replies
    1. I had been hoping to use them as a base for my new compost heap, but sadly they stayed away.

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