Monday 13 June 2011

Monty Update.

I haven't mentioned our new 'puppy', Monty, for a while. He's now 5 months old, he weighs much the same as a small car, and behaves like a typical ungainly youf.

He refuses to come when called, he eats like a horse (we're not sure he isn't one), and sleeps on my sofa at night after having been given strict instructions not to.

His favourite things to eat are horse manure, cow manure, and anything else he finds lying around. He doesn't feel properly dressed without a stick or ball in his mouth, and he still pees in the more bitch-like squatting position.

He's commited no serious misdemeanors up till now. He's had to be disciplined on occasions, but that's normal; I'd worry about him if he hadn't. So, I think we'll be keeping him; even if he does sleep like a Friday night drunk!

p.s. Ms Tadpole at the rescue center omitted to tell us that Labradors FART. So be warned; if you're thinking of getting a Lab' pup, place its basket by an open window.


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21 comments:

  1. are you taking him to obedience school? He is of age.
    Be glad he squats. Your furniture could be ruined.
    Save him the shavings of horse hoofs when the farrier comes by.

    just a thought. Shit won't kill him.

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  2. We're getting there, Grouch. Lady M bought a book, so training is her dep't.

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  3. Are you going to teach him to read? Wow!

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  4. Max, my puppy has been through all of those. he is now cocking his leg and loves doing it - looks so proud of himself, and he seems to have stopped eating pig poo!!
    Sue

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  5. Hello:
    Whatever, in an imperfect world he is close to perfection. Wonderful!

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  6. He's lovely Cro.

    My Cocker Spaniel, Faith, loves to roll in goose or fox shit whenever she finds some and my back is turned. It is the most foul smelling stuff you can think of.

    I'm sure he'll be a loyal companion. And you can blame your farts on the dog.

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  7. On the (distasteful) subject of dogs eating shit, I have heard that there is a valid reason for this. Apparently, dogs somehow know when they are lacking a particular strain of friendly bacteria in their gut, and eat another dog's shit to take it on. So it's best to turn a blind eye. Takes all sorts.

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  8. And I was just about to have lunch...

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  9. What hilarious comments Cro I like the one from Chris,our son has a labrador and his farts are famous we all run lol it is always when Rove is under the lunch table..

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  10. I really don't think the breed has much to do with the strange habits...my parents dachsund had all the same traits. Ah but they're great company.

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  11. Labs are such wonderful dogs. He is just being a "boy". When he gets more grown and mature, he will ... oh well, he probably won't be grown and mature until he is 3. No sense taling about that now. Enjoy the fun of his puppy years.

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  12. poo eating should be avoided totally apart from picking up bugs and infections it can become an unbreakable habit
    belive me
    it took 4 years to break my meg from the habit!!!
    he's a nice looking dog cro!

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  13. Oh man, oh man, this makes me miss my two big 'ol yellow labs SO much. Ours were gassy, too, btw.

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  14. Ah he's gorgeous! Love big lollopy dogs. Lol at him sleeping like a "friday night drunk". Hehehee

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  15. Sleeping like a Friday night drunk - what a brilliant caption of the picture. Monty's a star!

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  16. Since Monty has such a specialized diet, you must be saving on regular dog food.

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  17. This is an hysterical post, and so are some of the comments. Your pup would be right at home in a James Herriot book. In case you aren't familiar, he's a vet who has written some delightful (and often very funny) books about the animals he's cared for over the years. In one of his books is a snooty holier-than-thou woman with a non-existent sense of smell and a boxer who farts silently, but deadly, in front of her disgusted guests. As you can imagine, it makes for some very funny reading.

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  18. I thought from the picture that this would be a sad post. Happy that it's just a "he's a typical poop-eating, ruckus-making, puppy" post. He's adorable, that Monty. Makes a great welcome mat too!

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  19. Aren't they the best? I have a four month old golden retriever and I'm so glad to not feel so alone in my travails. Alas, he's just a puppy, doing what puppies do. Here, it's deer poop, any other would probably doo, yes, as well.

    He's a tulip eater, among other things, but when he ran out from among the ferns along the river with a bouquet of little blue forget-me-not's hanging from his mouth, all was forgiven.

    They will break our hearts one day, but that's part of the deal and I wouldn't miss it for the world.

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  20. Oh what a handsome lad Monty is! There's nothing quite like the joy of puppyhood. I know what you mean about them breaking your heart one day, but what a wonderful experience it is to love a dog and to be loved right back. I told my husband this morning that I was really missing Lily and he replied: "And she's missing you right back."

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