In the past I have refused to believe that I look old, but I suppose I now have to admit that I do. At nearer to 80 than to 70 it isn't surprising that I stumble around, and that bits occasionally fall off.
However, yesterday I experienced two age-related 'firsts'.
I was in a 'queue of two' waiting to pay for some Lamb I'd bought at my favourite Brighton shop 'Taj'.
When the woman in front of me had paid for her few purchases, she turned to me and asked if she could also pay for mine. I was quite shocked, and in my best cut-glass voice I thanked her, but declined her kind offer. Maybe she had just won the lottery and was feeling bountiful, but I suspect she thought I was some penniless elderly tramp.
After I had done a little more shopping over the road at Waitrose, I mounted the homeward bus. On entering the jam-packed double decker, a nice young lady offered me her seat, which I tried to decline, but she insisted. Just as I was about to sit down I noticed two 'elderly' women coming down the bus towards me, so I offered my as yet unoccupied seat to them. They refused, so I was the one who eventually travelled in comfort.
Maybe I have to accept that such things will now happen on a regular basis; my Sciatica won't complain. But I hope it'll still be me who gives up a seat on the bus, and if necessary pays someone else's supermarket tab.
I usually wear a hat when I go out and it covers the grey hair, so I never get offered seats on the buses nor anything else, which is fine with me. I guess it means I don't look as old as I am either.
ReplyDeleteIn my case a hat would not be rejuvenating. Knowing my choice of hats it would probably make me look even older.
DeleteThe first was very funny. I used to decline the offer of a seat but I now graciously accept it if I travelling a reasonable distance.
ReplyDeleteI found the offer quite shocking, but with my dodgy legs it was actually very welcomed.
DeleteTake heart, Cro, and do count your blessings. At least no one mistakes you as pregnant. Where I come from we were brought up to offer seats to anyone infirm, older or, visibly, with child.
ReplyDeleteAnd what of having sold your soul to the devil, your portrait wilting up there in the attic (ref. Oscar Wilde's "Dorian Gray") whilst, in real life, you are just your own illusion? Reminds me of one of my sisters. Don't ask.
As an aside, and on the upside, Kimbo will know what to expect in the mirror when the time comes.
My verdict? You have weathered well.
U
When I look at my various self-portraits I see a young man. If only I had that painting in the attic, I would be a happier chap.
DeleteOn my 60th we went into London to see a show. I was (for the first time) offered a seat on the tube both there and back. It made me acutely aware of the milestone birthday. Best to look at it as a compensation of getting older.
ReplyDeleteIt's pleasant in one way, but disheartening in another.
DeleteI would have been more shocked about the first offer than the second. I would not like to be mistaken for a tramp.
ReplyDeleteI have no idea why she offered to pay for me. She was a short, well-dressed, black lady, and her offer took me by surprise.,
DeletePerhaps you could wear a 3 piece suit and tie when you go shopping in future, so as not to be mistaken for a tramp/poor old pensioner?
ReplyDeleteI'm always reasonably well turned-out. Maybe it was because I was holding just one purchase that she made the offer. I really don't know.
DeleteThat lady in the shop was incredibly generous to make that offer, although I too, would have been taken aback by it.
ReplyDeleteSadly I don't see many youngsters here giving up their seat on the bus to an older person. Too intent on their 'phone screens.
On the spur of the moment I felt both insulted and flattered. I wasn't expecting it.
DeleteMy profile picture was taken on my 60th birthday Dec 2012 and most thought I looked more like 50. I will update it on the upcoming 70th. Since the fall I took when I slipped on black ice Dec 2013 and broke my lower back and neck and had two brain bleeds I have aged 20 years. I also have early onset Parkinson's Disease. Pain and opioids can really age you. I live in a small university town and I have a habit of following the student trends in dress. It makes you feel young and trendy. In public I do my best to act young and hide my canes if I can. But it never fails when waiting in a queue someone comes out and takes me out of queue and moves be to the head of the queue because they see the canes. If I refuse to do so it often makes those in the queue uneasy and to comment that I should move up. So I do. Almost 99% of the time I just let them send a senior van for me and use my wheel chair. I don't like being treated special-YET. I do however make every attempt to give up my seat to a more deserving person. I do have my big grocery shop for the month delivered and I even let them put the things away for me. They refuse a tip so I give the money to the fuel fund to defray the cost of operating the senior help vans. As a benefit for donating annually to the local senior center for many years and being a senior now I get a $75.00 debit card to purchase FRESH fruit and veggies each month. If I am having a good morning pain-wise and I able to drive the 1/8 th of a mile to McDonalds I get my free senior cup of coffee at the drive thru. I then drive around the campus checking out what is going on and then on the way home get a refill on the coffee. One handicap senior perk I do not like is the one at the Anglican Church. They insist that those with a disability sit right up in the front row. No nodding off allowed. No sneaking out early to avoid the traffic in the parking lot. Haha! So Cro, I think you look pretty damn distinguished and it's hard to believe you are the age you say you are. Haha! Be safe. Be happy. Adieu
ReplyDeleteThank you for that Woody. I'm sorry to hear about your back, neck, and head troubles, they sound dreadful. Like you I shall continue to offer my seat to those who I think have preference, and I shall also continue to think of myself as a Spring Chicken, even though I know I'm not.
DeleteWe always laugh when the cars stop to let us cross the road going to the village, it always amuses us.
ReplyDeleteI'm never in a hurry, so I stop for anyone.
DeleteSalutary moments. Remember, age is just a number. By the way, what was it like in The War?
ReplyDeleteLuckily I was born just after Jerry had put his hands in the air, but I'm old enough to still have my Ration Book.
DeleteMaybe she was just paying it on, and you presented the first opportunity.
ReplyDeleteGoodness knows. I did once pay someone's very small tab in France, but I never suspected it would happen to me!
DeleteWell I will try for third time with a different comment from before. Remember Cro, age is just a number! That remark is known as a pearl of wisdom.
ReplyDeleteI presume you mean Norman Wisdom.
DeleteLittle acts of kindness, there is hope for the future
ReplyDeleteI agree, I do my best!
DeleteThe kindness of complete strangers is reassuring. Thoughtful, kind and generous people are a gift. If you feel you are not looking as youthful as you want, a trip to the spa will do wonders.
ReplyDeleteBrighton is an amazingly friendly place. People constantly say 'hello' in the street, it's like France used to be 50 years ago.
DeleteSorry, my hand hit the publish button as I was typing
ReplyDeleteKindness is wonderful to read about. I am glad you had those experiences. Sorry if you feel old about it. You don't sound old.
Internally I'm about 30, externally about 90.
DeleteCro, I laughed reading this as it's happened to me recently also. I actually wrote about it on my blog "I'm old, I admit it!" While waiting for a table at a restaurant the bench was occupied by 4 others... so DH and I stood. No problem. But then a younger couple stood up and offered the seat to us... I declined, but they insisted, so I sat. DH didn't... but I thought it only polite to acknowledge their offer. But it was bittersweet. I had to think, 'how old do I look?"
ReplyDeleteIt's a strange dilemma between kindness and insult. I shall now err on the side of kindness.
DeleteIt's odd getting old isn't it. I'm 76 but in my head I find it impossible to believe it, I don't think I look that age but that's just my opinion, lol
ReplyDeleteAll three of my kids are in their 50's so I must be. My kids are just beginning to get ailments but I won't tell them that it's a downward spiral from now on, lol.
You still look distinguished to me Crow.
Briony
x
So sorry to get your name wrong, Cro not Crow, xxx
ReplyDeleteWe're the same age, and I think exactly the same. I keep saying to myself, and to my wife, 'How did that happen?'.
DeleteCould she have been looking for a date? The first offer.
ReplyDeleteNow there's a thought!!!
DeleteAre you sure she wasn't just suggesting you go in front of her as you only had one item?
ReplyDelete