Friday 6 July 2018

Tourists.



Lady Magnon recently accused me of wearing a swimming costume that was so faded, it was almost impossible to tell what had been its original colour. It had in fact started life (about 15 years ago) as red, but is now a very flattering faded pink. I told her that it clearly demonstrates that I'm not a 'tourist'. 

I know it's stereotyping, but the above photo does represent classic 'tourists'; you can spot them a mile off.

Going on holiday for many means buying a large selection of brand new gaudy 'seaside' clothes, and they wonder why they get mugged. Walk along the prom' in that stuff, and you're asking for trouble.

Most well-known Spanish (other countries are available) sea resorts are awash with pickpockets, con-men, immigrant gangs, and other general criminals, all of whom are just looking for gullible tourists.

So take my advice, when on holiday try to look like a local; old clothes, no flashy cameras, no studying of tourist guides in pavement cafés. And don't forget, when travelling, take HALF the amount of clothes you think you'll need, and TWICE the amount of money.

Happy Holidays!



32 comments:

  1. You don't have to be a "tourist" to be pick pocketed. When in Rome (no bull - the Italians are famed for it) your compatriots will make no distinction between you and your average American (nice pic, Cro - will make you lots of friends among your readers' American contingent).

    I could expand but it would blow the confines of your comment box. And then there is the story of my sister who fell in love (for the duration of her holiday) with a policeman (Naples). Car chase, bullets and all. It was one of her many rides in life.

    The main thing about crime and its payoff that you meet a lot of dashing policemen complete with uniform. Not least in Spain and the South of France.

    U

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Who said they were Americans? Personally I have never been attracted to 'dashing policemen' anywhere.

      Delete
    2. Come on, Cro. The pic you chose are your stereo "typical" Americans, complete with accent and loud voices and waist circumference.

      That you haven't been attracted to guys in uniform is the misfortune that comes with being a hetero male. I on the other hand ... in absence of which a sharp suit and a crisp shirt will do.

      Not so faded greetings,
      U

      Delete

      Delete
  2. We were robbed going into e Vatican one day many years ago. It taught us a valuable lesson - since that day (with my first husband, many years ago) - only ever take out just enough
    money for that day. Leave the rest in the hotel safe.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Sorry about missing the th off the!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My oldest was robbed in a café in Paris. Luckily he caught the little urchin, and dealt with him in traditional manner. My sister's suitcase went missing on a train from Paris to Italy, it was eventually found hidden at the far end of the train. It happens to us all.

      Delete
  4. We were robbed on a train from Vevey many years ago, midnight getting on and going to to sleep in our couchette. All our Xmas presents gone, disaster for my daughter. I have always wandered round in normal clothes can't bear being brightly dressed!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I believe couchettes are a favourite target. Best sleep with a taser under the pillow!

      Delete
  5. We notice tourists here too and sometimes we can tell from which country they come from. I think we all do look like a tourist when we go it another country.
    As for the Italians are famed for stealing, Ursula, isn't that been a little unfair? They are not Italians but trained pickpockets from a well known ethnic group that operate in many touristic countries.
    Greetings Maria x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I've been going to Italy for my holidays twice a year for twenty years and never had anything stolen, except my camera once in a cathedral by a gipsy woman with two children. Witness told me her nationality. She was definitely not an Italian.

      Delete
    2. Maria, the fact that Italians are "famed" for stealing was coined a long long time ago. I always took it as a compliment because to be an accomplished pick pocketeer you need to be fast, agile, nerves of steel. It's an art. An art to which I was objected a little while ago. No, not in Rome, in a city on the South Coast of England - as to the guy (and I did admire how nimble fingered he was without a hair - either his or mine - out of place, in fact I didn't even realize what had happened till I tried to pay for my next purchase) I couldn't possibly say whether he was Italian. But if he was it'd not only make a better story in the telling but me happier too. What is an Italian's castle is an Englishman's beach hut.

      Ciao,
      U

      Delete
  6. Old, faded and familiar, fitting your body, the most comfortable clothes to wear!
    The holiday uniform for American males used to be plaid shirts, Hawaiian shirts and the women all had a pink rinse in their hair.
    The English are just bright pink all over

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And don't forget the Germans, Local Alien. They are admired by all other nationalities (did I say 'admired?) for putting their beach towels down on the best loungers round the swimming pool, first thing in the morning when the Brits still sleep off last night's heavily laced Sangria.

      U

      Delete
  7. Good advice, especially the last paragraph. We received dire warnings about pickpockets in Barcelona, and while R and myself are very conscious of personal security, R's English sister and her husband are not, but we had no problem. I recall that some of commercial operators on Spanish beaches try to take care of tourists and warn them of potential pickpockets etc.

    ReplyDelete
  8. We all have to lighten up and laugh at ourselves more often. Those “tourists” look mighty proud that they coordinated their outfits so well. Bad taste and crime have no borders.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They wouldn't get lost in a crowd, that's for sure.

      Delete
  9. I just wear what's neat,comfortable, and more importantly comfortable shoes. I also have a one suitcase rule which I can manage on my own.
    I did have my phone stolen in a very good restaurant in London. It happens to all of us and I didn't miss it at all.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't think I've ever been a victim of street crime, but I'm a big ex-Rugby player. That probably helps.

      Delete
    2. Haha with your swollen knees !

      Delete
    3. I've just reported you to blogger chloe

      Delete
    4. What made you laugh today ?

      Delete
  10. Come to the Outer Hebrides. No pickpockets here.

    ReplyDelete
  11. What about the Englishman abroad?

    Two types come to mind. Tight, shiny nylon team shirts or cherry/pink red trousers. Both loud, both bizarre to all who encounter them.


    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Young Englishmen wear as little as possible (to show off their Arsenal tattoos); older Englishmen wear socks with their sandals. Every nationality has its stereotypes.

      Delete
  12. OMG you are too too funny, but about the last sentence, absolutely spot on. I used to need a Sherpa to follow me with all the luggage, but those days are gone (at least, for me) and I actually unburdens one when we have less to choose from. About the money, definitely. Everything is just so much more casual and so much more expensive than anyone could believe. However, I must say, there is NO chance I would ever "look" like a tourist. :)'s

    ReplyDelete
  13. I haven't (yet) been robbed on holiday. I suppose it is bound to happen, though. When I was 18 and fairly naive, another school chum and I traveled to France and Spain for a sun-scorched holiday. The friend had her passport and money stolen on an overnight train. She had to travel to the consulate in Paris to get things straightened out. I went on to Strassbourg and celebrated my birthday alone. I think I had the better deal.

    ReplyDelete

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...