Lady M: "Some 'charming young gentleman' (she actually used another word) has thrown his rubbish onto the top of the garage, can you get it down?"
Cro: "I'll do it first thing tomorrow morning. Are you sure it's rubbish?"
Lady M: "Looks like it from here, I can see empty beer cans"
Cro: "It's just that if it looks like 'swag', I might do it now!"
Lady M: "Leave it till tomorrow"
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So, after having returned from my early walk with Billy, I removed the frost from my step ladder and climbed onto the garage roof. There it was, a bag spilling cans all over the newly repaired surface.
It didn't take long to realise what it was. These weren't beer cans. Some little scumbag had presumably been caught spraying squiggles over walls, or some other flat surface, and had ditched his stash of spray cans so as not to be caught 'red handed' (yes, it was mostly red paint).
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There were about 4 large rubbish bins only a few yards away, but he rather stupidly chose our garage roof instead.
I didn't look to see if there was any incriminating evidence in his bag, and placed it where he should have; IN THE BIN.
10 minutes of my life wasted; but maybe a few walls saved as well!
You should not be climbing on to garage roofs.
ReplyDeleteThere were three men on it recently, when they replaced the roofing felt, so I knew it was safe.
DeleteSeconded, Rachel.
DeleteCro, I think Rachel is thinking of how precarious climbing the ladder rather than how solid the roof. There comes a time in life when we need to know our limitations rather than taking unnecessary risks. And, whatever you do, don't climb a chair to change that light bulb. Wait till your son comes round next time.
U
Yes that was so Ursula and my wording I thought indicated that. You may recall the falling off the step ladder gathering fruit or pruning something and that was to be the end of step ladders. Now we are climbing a step ladder with a guaranteed heavy landing place. Tut tut Cro.
DeleteOccasionally I throw caution to the winds, but not that often!
DeleteI blame Lady M.
DeleteShe chastises me too!
DeleteThey were probably empty and the walls had already been 'enhanced' with his territorial markers. MrT says that spraying is acceptable but his humans remain opposed to marking territory by any means.
ReplyDeleteActually they were mostly full, with some unused. Generally I hate graffiti, unless it's actual, good quality, painting. All the squiggles around drive me crazy.
DeleteAt least he didn't spray your garage first!
ReplyDeleteAmazingly our garage doors have remained un-squiggled. I hope it stays that way.
DeleteHe probably thinks he is an artist.
ReplyDeleteA piss artist, I would imagine!
DeleteFor once in my life I agree with Ursula (I also agree with Rachel, but not for the first time).
ReplyDeleteYou shouldn't be climbing step ladders at your age, especially one you've had to scrape frost off to start with!
I know you don't agree that it was a stupid move, but none of us are as young as we were, and we all have to start accepting that!
You should have asked Kimbo to get the rubbish down from the garage roof for you. I'm sure he would have been happy to do it, rather than his Dad risking his neck!!!
Consider yourself told off!
Hopefully fate will intervene, and have a nasty little happening lined up for the paint spraying little 'scrote' to walk into! X
I have slapped my wrist. I agree with you 100%.
DeleteLet's hope that Spotty Toe Rag doesn't seek vengeance by spraying something on your bijou hideaway like "GAZ WOZ ERE!" or "FRENCH GO OME!"
ReplyDeleteI'd set the dog on him. Billy would tear his pants off.
DeleteOh, it would have been interesting to note if there was a receipt in there. There are any number of words that Lady M might have used in place of 'gentleman', and I've had a fine time compiling a list. A morning brain exercise.
ReplyDeleteShe chose one of the juicier.
DeletePoor old Banksy, he leads a toturred life as an artist
ReplyDeleteHis 'kissing policemen' was just down the road, I wonder if it's still there? I know they covered it with a Perspex sheet.
DeleteI'm glad no paint was found on your new roof. That would have made matters 100% worse. As for ladders, can't one of your grandsons deal with tasks involving ladders?
ReplyDeleteThey only come down occasionally, then when they are here, there are too many distractions!
DeleteI'm worried about you as well. It only takes one wrong move and you'll end up like me { broken elbow } or worse. My husband was going to go for a walk today but I wouldn't let him ! The pavements are sheets of ice round here and it's just not worth it. XXXX
ReplyDeleteSame here. I had to wear my builders boots with soles like car tyres, even then I was cautious.
DeleteCheeky buggers don't care where they toss things. Over in a corner of "my" yard is a small pile of empty vodka bottles and old newspapers. I'm not touching them without rubber gloves, but I hope someone else will clean them up before I get fed up.
ReplyDeleteAnd usually there are nearby bins that they can't be bothered to use!!!!
Delete