Gibraltar (as some are aware) is where Cro and Lady Magnon agreed to love, honour, and obey each other; apart from which, it's a delightful BRITISH outpost at the delightful mouth of the delightful Mediterranean Sea.
But, what a weak, spineless, pathetic, bunch of yellow-livered, mamby-pamby, Nancy-boy, politicians we have back in the UK; in relation to Gibraltar's continued Britishness.
Those bullfighting, donkey tossing, paella eating, Spaniards are up to their puerile tricks again. Like the Argies before them, just when they can see the bottom of the bottomless pit they try to distract their anxious population with a spot of jingoism.
So Mr Cameron, if they're going to play silly buggers, what are you going to do about it?
May I suggest (for a start) that you now make 3 separate gates at all UK immigration points; EU Nationals, Non-EU Nationals, and Spanish Nationals. And guess how long it might take our Spanish friends to get through? May I suggest at least a week (during which time they would have to surrender their shameful toy-town Spanish passports for very close and painstaking inspection, and submit to a full 'intimate' body search for drugs etc)!
And what about a basic road tax for all incoming Spanish lorries, trucks, and cars as they disembark at Dover (and elsewhere). Maybe £2,000 for lorries, £1,000 for smaller trucks, and £600 for cars (per person, per day, of course).
If that ain't a reasonable enough red rag answer to their posturing bull(shit); then I don't know what is!
So get off the bloody fence Dave. It no use just passing the buck to the EU courts of injustice, pull your bloody finger out NOW.
All that, and I didn't even mention Cueta; damn, I just did!
I rather suspect that the chaps in Downing Street will simply roll over and offer their belly for tickling. No doubt we will be expected to clean the windows and vacuum the whole place before surrendering the keys to Gibraltar. We used to be a nation on its knees, we've sunk even lower since. So sad. Perhaps someone could check with the donkey-tossers if we owe them any back-rent for the rock?
ReplyDeleteI wasn't aware of this and don't have a horse in the race but I'm supporting my internet friends. Not only that but I think long established boundaries where the people living there are satisfied...what's the point of upsetting the apple cart?
ReplyDeleteAfter all does government exist for the people or do people exist for the government?
I wish No 10 followed your blog Cro!
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately, I imagine them all sitting there like the 3 Wise Monkeys though - with a 4th one inserting a digit in a strategic place!
Brilliant post, Cro - Colonel Blimp at his best! I say why stop there? Why don't we declare war on those perfidious Spaniards? We had better warn all those retired Brits in Marbella first though, and maybe send a fleet of fishing vessels to evacuate them.
ReplyDeleteI heard that before this little crisis, all the Gibraltans spoke to each other in Spanish, but now - for the time being - they converse in English, albeit with a very thick, Spanish accent...
When we were there (1970-ish) it was all fish-n-chip shops and Tea like Mum makes. But everyone was called Garcia, and if you shouted 'PEDRO' a huge crowd would gather around you.
DeleteI shall now make a large poster saying Cro for P M.
ReplyDeleteI have only been to Gibraltar once, en route for Casablance. All I remember of it is a) when you take off again you are pretty certain you are going to end up in the sea and b) when you land they close the crossing gates across an ordinary road, so that you feel rather like an express train going through.
You do live in France rather than Spain don't you?
I wouldn't like to see you being drummed out of your village by irate Spaniards. Although knowing you I am sure you would put up a good fight.
I'm sharpening my sword as I write, but I don't think they'd venture this far north.
DeleteDoes the average Spaniard really care? I get the impression it is more to do with the policy of an unpopular government.
ReplyDeleteSimple distraction. But they do distract quite regularly.
DeleteThanks for the steer you gave me yesterday, btw, I AM following it up. Not to make capital out of the connection, but to give his proteges the chance of a real 'gap year' experience.
DeleteThat's what I thought.
DeleteHappy to hear that the US is not the only country with officials shooting deflated basketballs from the backs of dead donkeys as they play games with no rules or goals. I don't know why that makes me happy...but it does
ReplyDeleteSo, Cro, tell us how you really feel.
ReplyDeleteMy page may catch fire!
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