It's mid Morel Mushroom season, and as usual I can't find a single one. I've never been able to find them. 
In the corner of our kitchen we have one of those tall galvanised two-handled florist's pots, in which we keep our walking sticks, brollies, etc; and I'll tell you from whence it came. Many years ago, back in Brighton, I had taken some rubbish to the local tip, when I encountered a very irate and red-faced man, 'chucking' (and I mean 'chucking') perfectly good looking stuff out of the back of his car. Amongst the pile were several brand new hockey sticks, piles of women's clothing, expensive looking shoes, books, kitchen equipment, suitcases, radios, etc.
Amongst all this stuff I spotted the aforementioned brand new florist's pot, and I asked the man if I could take it.
"Take what you effing like" he shouted. "You can have the whole effing lot, for all I effing care!".
I took the pot and left. It was pretty obvious what was going on, and I didn't want to get involved. What his wife/girlfriend thought when she returned to get her things; I can't imagine. There must have been one hell of a fight; if not a court case!
Anyway, she's not getting her galvanised florist's pot back; it was given to me fair-n-square!
The tiny settlement in which I live contains 3 houses, and a rarely-occupied small log cabin. But between us we have 9 vehicles; only ONE of which is ours. Too many? 
I've just received my bill for this year's insurance. Both Lady Magnon and myself are insured to drive the family Compact Royce, and for that pleasure my annual charge is an outrageous €182 (£160 or $256).
Considering that Lady M and myself are both extremely cautious drivers, I consider this no more than THEFT.
When 'Lord' Mandy took over from Gerald Kaufman as Britain's most hated politician, we knew we were in the presence of a classic brown-nosed creep; he was dubbed 'The Prince of Darkness'.Amazingly he's just twigged (the public always knew this) that all the foreign aid money given to Africa over the years, has been money down the drain.
Even the late-arrivals threw their hands up in horror when the 'Merc's for Malawi' scandal broke in 2000. The Scottish Parliament's cash for a fleet of 37 luxury Merc's for the lads, was a Merc' too far.
So why has Mandy only now discovered the truth, or been prepared to tell the truth, when the rest of us knew yonks ago. And why do the Swiss bankers (who are the recipients of so much of this 'filtered' cash) continue not to inform the naive benefactors?
Be warned; Mandy wouldn't now be saying this, if there wasn't something behind it all. The only question is WHAT!
He's got his gong. He's got his over-paid jobs. Perhaps like his chum Blair before him, he wishes to become an 'envoy'; to Africa maybe?
The Middle East has proved nothing but trouble since Tony took over HIS 'envoy' job, so what could we expect from Africa, with Mandy at the helm? Boggle... Boggle... Boggle...
