Monday, 1 June 2020

Time (and lives) wasted on hatred.



After yesterday's posting (which I've now deleted on account of the amount of venom) This subject seems to be apt.

Hatred of others is such a debilitating waste of time. There have been several notable cases recently of 'celebs' wishing that Boris had died from his COVID-19 illness. I can think of no nastier desires from those on the left than to wish someone dead, simply because they see things differently, and are usually more successful.

I've known people myself whose whole lives are dedicated to hatred and conflict; they are simply not happy unless they have someone to hate, and people to annoy (usually their neighbours). It's a strange trait, because it ends with them, themselves, being disliked by everyone around them. Hatred breeds hatred.

Such hatred is usually accompanied by invented stories. I suppose in recent times Mrs Thatcher must have been the recipient of more lies and hatred than almost any other person. Mrs T was a very determined woman, and would stand no nonsense. Her sole aim was to bring the UK back from the financial ruin of the previous Labour government; which she did. Along the way she encountered Luddites of the worst sort, and as the economy soon returned to 'boom', she became the perfect target for the left, and they didn't hold back. They still don't!

Boris is now receiving similar venom over his handling of COVID. Every armchair scientist has an opinion, and 'opposition parties' in particular all demand the opposite of whatever's being recommended; simply to be contrary. They have been fighting on the streets of Spain, Germany, and even Hong Kong, and their ilk have been holding demonstrations on the streets of London; including Corbyn's own darling brother, Piers. It's almost as if they are desperate to spread the virus.

Why can't people simply be nice to each other. It costs nothing, it creates calm, and, I'm certain, improves one's mental health. A certain blog Troll comes to mind.


60 comments:

  1. People can still be nice while disagreeing. Most of us do it in real life every day.

    I just read the deleted post in my RSS feed and I didn't see anything wrong with it. I was reminded of the ponderously long French phrase for Sony Walkman that was dreamt up at the time.

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    1. You may not have seen the disgraceful comments by Rosa/Chloe towards John. They were beyond all decency, and designed to be hurtful.

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    2. I agree with Andrew re differing opinions not needing to divide people. Sometimes I wonder if it's a cultural thing how we interpret each other. Look at Mediterranean countries, not least Italians. Arms flailing, gestures the meaning of which one dares not to guess at, voices raised to a level all the neighbours will be kept in the loop. And that's just the Mama who loves her wayward sons and would take a bullet for them.

      I didn't see the comments you, Cro, are referring to. What John, and it's only a suggestion not a certainty, doesn't appear to understand that the Rosas of this world are like wasps. The more you flap your arms the more likely they are to sting you. The reason I engage with her occasionally because whatever her/his shortcomings she/he is a human being too. It's easy to forget. If I go on like this soon I'll be likened to Chamberlain and his misguided attempts at appeasement.

      U

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    3. I'm glad you didn't see them. I was shocked by her nastiness. Far too personal about someone who's had a rough time over the past year or so. I can't allow that sort of thing on this page. I just wish I'd seen it all earlier.

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    4. My fault cro......rule of thumb in psychiatric nursing,
      " never engage with amean drunk!"

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    5. I'm pleased you took it all so well; or at least pretend to have done so!

      Delete
  2. I have been ill for a few days, so I didn't read your post.
    Sorry that there is so much hate , disagreeing is something that happens.no need to be vile.
    parsnip

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    1. The nastiness had nothing to do with 'Franglais', which was my subject matter. It was simply pure evil.

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  3. I don't have your problem as people reading my Blog are bored to apathy.
    Just moderate comments and delete those from folk that don't have a Blogger platform of their own.

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    1. With respect, Adrian, may I point out that one doesn't need to publish a newspaper in order to read others; consequently writing a "letter to the editor".

      U

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    2. I'll have to look into it. I can't go on like this. It takes all the fun out of blogging; which I suppose is the intention.

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    3. Taking "all the fun out of blogging" - that is indeed a charge I do lay at Rosa's doorstep, on your behalf. Question is, but even I can't convey this to him/her, what's the point? You are some (nice) guy somewhere in France, tending to Haddocks, cleaning out the pool, enjoying life notwithstanding the odd snake and/or hornet. Why spoil it with attacks on the person? To put it another way, Cro, if you were my father and someone did that to him I'd be livid. Not least because of an equilibrium being disturbed but also the question what purpose is being served. Alas, and it's of little comfort, Cro, once we put ourselves onto the strange world of the internet and its fallout we live at our peril.


      Meanwhile, just to keep you up to date as to Blighty's shenanigans, lockdown has gone to pot.

      U

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    4. If there was a way of blocking someone, I would do it, but Mr Blogger has omitted that facility. The only other person I needed to block was accepted voluntarily, and he has stuck to it. In his case it was drunken insults for no other reason than alcohol. I suspect that a certain person has personal problems that make her so nasty, and I would have thought that someone in her situation would have tried to make friends; not enemies. Alas not.

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    5. Like Adrian, I hardly get any comments, so when I see some of the nasty things people write on your blog, I am glad I don’t have that problem. Yesterday, I could see where it was going, lost interest and like the News of the World reporter... left!

      LX

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    6. I only saw the worst of it this morning. It was really disgusting.

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  4. I certainly would hate to be barred from reading a blog I found by accident just because I don't blog myself. There are many reasons to blog and many reasons some don't blog. But to say that I would never go to a persons blog I enjoy and just fling around vitriol it's not my style. I just would read it if I disagreed with post after post. Not to say I always agree with what people write but as it is their blog they have that right. Too much negativity going on in the world right now to add to it!

    Jo in Auckland

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    1. Bah proof read the above 3 times and there is still a pesky "not" missing. It should say... I just would NOT read it if I disagreed with post after post! There; that's better.

      Jo in Auckland

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    2. It's people's motives that baffle me. What is the point of being constantly negative and nasty? It makes no sense.

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  5. It is in your hands to deal with, Cro, and nobody else's.

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    1. Which is why I was compelled to delete the whole of my yesterday's posting. It started as a simple piece about Franglais, and ended up as disgusting hate-fest from that nasty man/woman called either Rosa or Chloe.

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    2. It was ruined as soon as it was published.

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  6. I have noticed through life that the some left wing voters seem to spout so much hate. It is fine to disagree with people ... it’s healthy and what makes the world go round but those that wished Boris dead from the virus have obviously got big problems. Miriam Margolyes was one and my friend is another. She wrote in her Facebook page ‘ Ding Dong the witch is dead ‘ when Margaret Thatcher died and agreed with Margolyes. Politics should not come into this pandemic. As for trolls well, the best way to treat them is to ignore them.... completely. Never answer them back ..... they hate that. If you don’t bite back there is nowhere for them to go.Just delete their comment.
    Food and wine and gardening are much nicer things to talk about ! Have a lovely week Cro. XXXX

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    1. We also have a friend (private education, lives off the state, pro-Hamas, PC to the extent of madness, etc) who is totally against everything good done by the Tories. She's known as 'The Duchess' on account of her snobbery. Because of her own personal failures, she cannot stand the success of others. There's one around every corner.

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  7. Everyone has an opinion, these days they also have loads of platforms to voice it, some people can't pass by something they disagree with, they turn it into something else, which must of happened yesterday to you, sadly these are the people with the loudest voices. They do not represent the majority of us.

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    1. Yesterday started off on the topic of Franglais, and finished with horrible insults towards someone who really didn't warrant it. It was disgraceful.

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  8. Well,I didnt see it...but now its gone,forgotten and a new sunny day is here!.So I hope that you have a lovely day and enjoy every second of it!.I think you are a lovely man!,xx

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    1. It is a lovely day here. Thank you Debi, I do try to be a nice person.

      Delete
  9. You're correct, there's some individuals and sections of society who seem to be looking for something to complain about or some conflict to become involved in. I've had the misfortune to live next door to some of them.

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    1. We have one who stays at a house nearby.... never happy unless he's in conflict with someone. He's probably the most disliked person I know, and all of his own doing. V odd.

      Delete
  10. I have always steered away from controversy and confrontation; arguments make me feel physically sick and very anxious. I usually do not post or comment on anything that may be contentious for that reason. I cannot understand the depth of hatred some people seem to feel. Life is short enough without spending it seething in vitriol.

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    1. I am one of those annoying people who wakes happy, and with any luck it stays that way all day. I don't like conflict either.

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  11. My blogging fun has returned, since I blocked any anonymous comments, even if they do put their name to it. Only gooooglie accounts can get through, and I moderate. I can recommend it for keeping your sanity.

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    1. I have followed your advice, and it now says that 'only people who are members of this blog may post a comment'. I'm not sure if that'll fix the problem, but we'll see. Thanks.

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    2. I've now un-done it, as it seemed as if I'd blocked everyone. I can't win!

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    3. If you tick the box allowing anyone with a google account can comment, then most people will be able to comment. You ticked only people who are members of this blog, and they are not, so they were blocked. If you get my drift.

      I lost a few commenters because they don't have a google account, but it's easy to sign up for one. I see that Starting over, and Carol do have accounts, so they will be ok.

      Delete
  12. Well, Cro, I'm not sure whether I'm a member of your Blog. Before I waste my time I'll post this and see.

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    1. Ah. As you can seen that was done before you unblocked us all.

      Hatred is one of the most destructive emotions to haters and hated alike but more so to the haters because it consumes them. Unfortunately it is endemic in the far left and far right of the political spectrum worldwide just as it is endemic in every other sphere of society. Like you, Cro, I am fortunate to be both a happy and an optimistic person. So hatred is not something from which I suffer. However I used to find, for example, when I was paid to put a particular point of view at a public inquiry members of the public had a habit of assuming they were my views. People could get extremely abusive about it.

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    2. Yes, I'm sorry about that. I thought I was doing the right thing; it turned-out that I wasn't. People can get nasty in the most innocent of circumstances; I've had my fill.

      Delete
  13. Hi Cro. For years I had another blog where someone just trolled me and any comment that was on my blog. I shut that blog down as I just couldnt take the hate from this person who I had never met. I have no idea why anyone would be so upset over things like me growing tomatoes. I changed my comments on my new blog to people who had blogger accounts. it is in the settings area, scroll down to the posts comments, sharing area, click on that a new part pops up on the right . and there should be a bit where it says Who can comment. if you click Users with Google accounts. They dont have to have a blog, but they can just register. They dont need to do anything else, but sign in. or leave themselves signed in. It does mean the more industrious troll can just get extra accounts. but it does stop some. Or the one that I think works the best in the button for Comment Moderation. Drives some people absolutely nuts. as they want to see their comment arrive immediately. But it means I can read it . and if I think it is a troll. I delete it and move on. no one else then has the chance to defend me, jump on the troll or leave other bile. It seems to stop them as they dont get the reaction that they are wanting. Its kind of the reverse of instagram likes. people post for likes. trolls post for someone to come back with hate. its a game. It s like food for them. Dont feed the trolls. they will soon move on. I say add comment moderation for a few weeks. it will mean you have to check for comments, but you will get more comments from people who are genuine and have read what you have written rather than just being hateful. I hope your day gets better

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    1. I've never really liked the idea of sanctioning comments, and I don't like to be sanctioned when I'm commenting elsewhere; but of course it would be a solution! I think I'll just have to delete when necessary, and hope that I get there quickly.

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    2. The comments don't reflect on you, Cro, but on Rosa. What a sad individual!

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    3. The reason I dislike comment moderation is simply that I can't read what's been said before I comment and there is no flow or conversation. I do follow some blogs with comment moderation but prefer otherwise.

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    4. I was more thinking that you turn it on for a while and the person loses interest. More than likely bothering someone else with their shit minds.

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  14. Too lazy to hate.
    Hate simply takes too much energy, makes you ill and shortens your life.

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    1. Tigger is right. I've known several people whose bitterness has been their own undoing.

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    2. I know one person for whom Oscar Wilde's statement is perfectly apt. "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends".

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  15. I didn't see the nasty comments, thank goodness, but I do so enjoy reading your daily comments, and John's too. Please don't allow the ugly people to drive you away from this blog. Especially during this lonely time, there are too few reasonable, intelligent sources of happiness to access. You are a valued part of my life, though far away and we'll never meet. I'm sorry that some people just have to be ugly. Don't let them get you down.

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    1. Thank you for that Karren, I appreciate it. These things do get on one's nerves occasionally, but the problem is with them rather than with me. I should remember that!

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  16. I tried commenting but it told me that I could not post on your site.

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  17. Ah, it got published. Before it told me that I had to be a member of a “team”.

    We are blessed to have a person like John on Blogger who is fun, witty and a talented writer and for someone to disparage him is more than wrong. I did not see the posts and I am glad of that.

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    1. Sorry, I was trying something. All back to normal now. John is not only a very interesting person, he is also a hero in my eyes. Being a nurse in these times is no less than heroic!

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  18. I missed your earlier post, so I don't fully understand all the comments here BUT I do think you wrote a splendid piece here, Cro, and thank you for that!

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    1. You are probably better off not having seen them... they were quite disgusting.

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  19. Ahh, I tried to comment earlier and was also told that I couldn't comment as I wasn't a member of the team. What I originally said was that I couldn't understand how trolls could attack such an inoffensive blog and that the problem is clearly their own. I said that I don't always comment but I always read and always read all the comments. Thank you Cro for letting me back in. I must admit I did feel shut out. You really can't win can you but I am glad to be back.

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    1. I apologise Carol; all back to normal now.

      Delete
  20. Just checking to see if I can comment again.
    Did email yesterday to say how sorry I was to hear about all the nastiness. A truly sad person.

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    1. I just hope she stays away. A really vile person.

      Delete
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