Tuesday, 13 January 2015

The New Axe.



Just before Christmas, in preparation for a hard winter, I bought myself a new axe; my old one was on its last legs.

About two days ago the bloody thing broke (above), so you can imagine my pleasure when I noticed a sticker on the handle which said that it was guaranteed for FIVE YEARS. Very reassuring.

However; one should never be fooled by 'guarantees'. Looking at the small print, I noticed that there were provisos. 

Unfortunately the FIVE YEAR GUARANTEE states 'usure et manche exclus'.

For those who may not speak French, this means that any wear to either the blade or the handle are excluded. 

Meaning, one presumes, that if the axe remains totally unused for FIVE YEARS, it will remain FULLY GUARANTEED.

Well, I suppose that is some comfort.


Life eh?




34 comments:

Sherry said...

Excludes the blade and handle? That makes no sense at all! I'd take it back.

Cro Magnon said...

They'd probably just say "You've used it; what do you expect". Rather like a hammer I once bought where the head fell off just as it was about to strike its first nail.

cumbrian said...

My axe has been in the family for e generations, and has only had 4 new shafts and 2 new heads.

Cro Magnon said...

I have a broom like that; I wonder if it's the same maker?

Frances said...

Haha…..This reminded me of Trigger's brush !

Andi's English Attic said...

Trading Standards? Is there no French Esther Rantzen who could sort it out? I think you should find out what exactly the guarantee covers then. Perhaps the air around it?

Young at Heart said...

How dangerous....could have had someone's eye out...hope you were wearing your hi-vis vest!!

Hippo said...

I have two, one with a wooden shaft (the head keeps falling off) and one with a bright yellow uPVC handle which is just the job. Not only does it work, I can find the thing easily.

Cro Magnon said...

I imagine it's another way of saying 'we guarantee nothing'.

Cro Magnon said...

I also have one with a yellow fibre handle; the head comes off, and the handle broke and is now too short.

Frugal in Derbyshire said...

Beat me to that one!

Gerry Snape said...

Chopping wood before Christmas the potters axe broke at the shaft...off to B n Q ..lovely new one..stashed in the woodshed....next morning ..GONE...pinched...next one stored in the studio!

Tom Stephenson said...

They obviously knew the old 'Grand Mother's Axe' fable.

Cro Magnon said...

My new one is lighter than the above. 1.5 kilos, instead of 1.8 kilos. Surprising what a difference it makes; I should have looked more closely. I leave mine outside all the time.

Gary said...

Your chickens must have very tough necks Cro.

A Heron's View said...

Your consumer rights are covered in full below in the reproduction of the European directive, which all European member states have adopted. However the key points are that any product bought in an EU country including France have to conform to their specification, in other words be - 'Fit for Purpose' - if the product fails due to manufacturing problems or lack of conformity within 2 years from the date of purchase you have various rights for replacement items, refunds etc. all with the seller.

Stick the French Consumer Rights Directive under their noses and tell them that you will take the matter to your Avocat (solicitor). Maybe slowly the French after sales service will improve if we make them do their job!

French Consumer Rights - European Union

Starting Over, Accepting Changes - Maybe said...

Sometimes the store where you bought it will replace it even if there is no guarantee. Costco, for one, takes everything back. The customer is always right.

Bill said...

I'd say that's more than what could reasonably be called "wear" on the handle.

Cro Magnon said...

The exterior was wood, the interior balsa wood.

Cro Magnon said...

May I give them your address?

Anonymous said...

That's quite the guarantee...could you not tell them it was just hanging on the woodshed wall for decoration when the damage occurred? Give it a shot. I'd love to know if they replace it.
The hubs bought a pry bar years ago and the first time he tried to use it it broke in half. He marched it back to the store for a refund and they wanted to know what he had been doing with it.

A Heron's View said...

Yes, if you know it.

New World said...

Zzzzzzzzzzzzz

Cro Magnon said...

Aspirins, black coffee, and then the zzzzzzzz's.

elaine said...

What on earth were you doing with it for it to break so drastically.

John said...

Buy crap buy twice.....or thrice

Cro Magnon said...

Splitting logs. I think it was just a duff bit of wood (especially up at the top).

Cro Magnon said...

It wasn't supposed to be crap; it was a good make!

Cro Magnon said...

Sihde Cottage, Pixie Rd, Leprechaunville. Is that it?

The Weaver of Grass said...

The farmer would probably say 'things ain't what they used to be.'
His father would probably tell his favourite story about the broom he had had lad all his working life, which had only had six new handles and four new sets of brushes.

A Heron's View said...

Not exactly... it might work though :)

Amy Saia said...

We should all call you Thor now. Thor of the broken axe.

Shrimpton and Perfect said...

Completely bonkers. I hope you get your money back, as its not fit for purpose.

Jean
x

Kev Alviti said...

Maybe I could give the same with my work!

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