Tuesday 13 January 2015

The New Axe.



Just before Christmas, in preparation for a hard winter, I bought myself a new axe; my old one was on its last legs.

About two days ago the bloody thing broke (above), so you can imagine my pleasure when I noticed a sticker on the handle which said that it was guaranteed for FIVE YEARS. Very reassuring.

However; one should never be fooled by 'guarantees'. Looking at the small print, I noticed that there were provisos. 

Unfortunately the FIVE YEAR GUARANTEE states 'usure et manche exclus'.

For those who may not speak French, this means that any wear to either the blade or the handle are excluded. 

Meaning, one presumes, that if the axe remains totally unused for FIVE YEARS, it will remain FULLY GUARANTEED.

Well, I suppose that is some comfort.


Life eh?




34 comments:

  1. Excludes the blade and handle? That makes no sense at all! I'd take it back.

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    Replies
    1. They'd probably just say "You've used it; what do you expect". Rather like a hammer I once bought where the head fell off just as it was about to strike its first nail.

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  2. My axe has been in the family for e generations, and has only had 4 new shafts and 2 new heads.

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  3. Haha…..This reminded me of Trigger's brush !

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  4. Trading Standards? Is there no French Esther Rantzen who could sort it out? I think you should find out what exactly the guarantee covers then. Perhaps the air around it?

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    Replies
    1. I imagine it's another way of saying 'we guarantee nothing'.

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  5. How dangerous....could have had someone's eye out...hope you were wearing your hi-vis vest!!

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  6. I have two, one with a wooden shaft (the head keeps falling off) and one with a bright yellow uPVC handle which is just the job. Not only does it work, I can find the thing easily.

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    Replies
    1. I also have one with a yellow fibre handle; the head comes off, and the handle broke and is now too short.

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  7. Chopping wood before Christmas the potters axe broke at the shaft...off to B n Q ..lovely new one..stashed in the woodshed....next morning ..GONE...pinched...next one stored in the studio!

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    Replies
    1. My new one is lighter than the above. 1.5 kilos, instead of 1.8 kilos. Surprising what a difference it makes; I should have looked more closely. I leave mine outside all the time.

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  8. They obviously knew the old 'Grand Mother's Axe' fable.

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  9. Your chickens must have very tough necks Cro.

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  10. Your consumer rights are covered in full below in the reproduction of the European directive, which all European member states have adopted. However the key points are that any product bought in an EU country including France have to conform to their specification, in other words be - 'Fit for Purpose' - if the product fails due to manufacturing problems or lack of conformity within 2 years from the date of purchase you have various rights for replacement items, refunds etc. all with the seller.

    Stick the French Consumer Rights Directive under their noses and tell them that you will take the matter to your Avocat (solicitor). Maybe slowly the French after sales service will improve if we make them do their job!

    French Consumer Rights - European Union

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  11. Sometimes the store where you bought it will replace it even if there is no guarantee. Costco, for one, takes everything back. The customer is always right.

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  12. I'd say that's more than what could reasonably be called "wear" on the handle.

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    Replies
    1. The exterior was wood, the interior balsa wood.

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  13. That's quite the guarantee...could you not tell them it was just hanging on the woodshed wall for decoration when the damage occurred? Give it a shot. I'd love to know if they replace it.
    The hubs bought a pry bar years ago and the first time he tried to use it it broke in half. He marched it back to the store for a refund and they wanted to know what he had been doing with it.

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  14. Replies
    1. Aspirins, black coffee, and then the zzzzzzzz's.

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  15. What on earth were you doing with it for it to break so drastically.

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    Replies
    1. Splitting logs. I think it was just a duff bit of wood (especially up at the top).

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  16. Buy crap buy twice.....or thrice

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    Replies
    1. It wasn't supposed to be crap; it was a good make!

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  17. The farmer would probably say 'things ain't what they used to be.'
    His father would probably tell his favourite story about the broom he had had lad all his working life, which had only had six new handles and four new sets of brushes.

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  18. We should all call you Thor now. Thor of the broken axe.

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  19. Completely bonkers. I hope you get your money back, as its not fit for purpose.

    Jean
    x

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  20. Maybe I could give the same with my work!

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