Providing that St Peter hasn't read all the bad bits in my obituary resumé, I'm hoping that he'll allow me into heaven; even if it's to sit in the back seats. The alternative is not to my taste.
What I'm hoping he'll offer me is quite easy, and undemanding. I'm a simple soul.
Heaven (as everyone knows) is situated right beside our house in France, and once again I will be able to occupy my ancient sitting room. The huge fireplace will have been stripped of its wood-burner, and the fire returned to its original state with metre-length (everlasting) oak logs slowly burning over the ancient hand crafted fire-dogs.
In front of the fire will be a Golden Retriever Dog, playing with a Tabby Kitten (Billy is watching from his bed; he's not the playful type).
Slowly cooking on the fire are some Lamb chops (sprinkled with cumin powder), with some Foil-wrapped potatoes amongst the glowing embers. There is an open bottle of Pécharmant warming by the fire, and the table is set with antique glasses, and dark green Biot plates.
It is late Autumn, and still not too cold. In the woods there are Cepes and Chestnuts, and my fruit trees are permanently covered in Peaches, Figs, Apples, Plums, and Pears. Haddock's has come back to life, and all the vegetables that I used to grow, are now growing again. Heaven has no slugs or bugs!
Since moving to heaven, my aches and pains have gone, and I have returned to being 100% mobile. I have also regrown my hair, and my teeth are once again that perfect set of my youth.
In one corner of the room there is a fully decorated Christmas Tree, with a few brightly wrapped presents beneath. On top of the tree, in place of the fairy, sits Mrs Pins; my daughter's Teddy Bear. Billy is looking at his own presents with his usual impatience.
Later in the evening there is a knock at the door, and I find holograms of my three children, and my six grandsons, all eagerly waiting to enter. We sit around the fire and sing carols together, and drink mulled wine.
I'm hoping that 'heaven' will be achievable. I've not been bad, I've never stolen anything, I haven't committed any crime, and I like to think I've been kind to my fellow man/woman.
It's all now in the hands of St Peter.
"... not demanding"? You may not have lied or stolen in your life (truly?) but you sure are greedy. Still, I hope your wish/es will come true. Essentially, re-living the good parts of your life.
ReplyDeleteI am a little more ambitious than you. Should I end up in heaven I'll give God a run for his money. He can explain to me - in person - why he is such a brute. Let's not even mention what he put Abraham, Lot or rather Lot's wife, Noah through. Not to forget Adam and Eve; and the serpent. God is vindictive. Remember Jesus Christ, his "son"? "Father, Father why have you forsaken me?" Indeed.
So, yes, once God and I have had it out with each other, I will sit with Jesus and discuss God and the world :) with him. Peace.
A word of comfort, Cro: As both of us are christened - and should we end up in hell - at least we won't end up in limbo.
See you when I see you,
U
I was hoping that 'god' might stay in the background, or already have been sent to hell by St Peter for all his/her nastiness.
DeletePete is the only one I need.
Why no mention of your wife Lady Magnon who has shared your life, borne your children and no doubt been a help mate to you.
ReplyDeleteI'm hoping she'll outlive me. And (as I mentioned) my children will only be holograms. Lady M has better things to do!
DeleteShame I won't get to visit you there. No doubt I shall end up somewhere warmer.
ReplyDeleteI'll keep the fire lit for you; you'd be fine!
DeleteNot greedy at all, just expecting heaven to be heavenly!
ReplyDeleteSounds like your best scenario..... for you
I'm now almost looking forward to it.
DeleteA lovely vision and a great idea for a blogpost Crozier - but how will you be able to get in and out of your heavenly house with your halo, your harp and your massive angel wings - like those of a giant gobbler?
ReplyDeleteI'm more worried about my swollen head, and my inflated ego.
DeleteThat, Cro.... shows you do not need access to paint, pastels, crayons or pencils to create a picture.... you can do it in words!!
ReplyDeleteJust don't peep inside my head; it's a mess in there!
DeleteYou aren't going anywhere yet! So don't tempt fate. As long as you can pay the ferryman, you'll be fine.
ReplyDeleteI hope to be hanging on for a while yet. But I'm realistic.
DeleteI believe in "Heaven" - I really don't think this is all - My mum and I was surprised my dad too who were both certain - This was mentioned to me individually whilst they were young and healthy - So your Heaven Cro shall be - flis x
ReplyDeleteI think it's a nice idea, but other than that..... I'm not so sure!
DeleteI just hope I don't get to my heaven, settle in to the bliss, then get sent back down to this hell hole for another lifetime.
ReplyDeleteKeep your past hidden (as much as possible), and SMILE.
DeleteI remember learning about purgatory when quite young. (Apparently, it's the holding area/lounge between heaven and hell where one can leisurely work out the rough edges and work your way up) I was resoundingly scolded by our village priest when I told him it really didn't seem like such a bad place and why try so hard for heaven. Yea, I was that kind of kid. Never made that mistake again.
ReplyDeleteYour version of heaven sounds quite blissful and lovely. Thinking I'll shoot for that version from this point forward.
You make it all sound so perfect Cro, and given your love of France and your life there I'm sure many of us wonder why you didn't become a resident after Brexit. Surely the paperwork involved would all have been worth it?
ReplyDeleteHeaven/Hell? I hope that I've got a good few years on earth before I find out - one way or the other!
You live a well-ordered life in the here and now, so I expect nothing less in the hereafter.
ReplyDelete