Rap 'music'

As news comes of yet another 'Rap Singer' (named Offset?) being shot, in a US casino, one has to wonder why these people are so aggressive towards one another. One has to presume that such aggression is all part of their identity and raison d'etre.

You don't hear of people like Cliff Richard shooting at Elton John, or Vera Lynn shooting at Doris Day, so why do these people, usually with very silly names, all seem to hate each other? Maybe it's to do with alternative 'business matters', rather than the 'music'.

If (like me) you don't know much about Rap 'music', here is a standard example (above) from S London. I think it's much the same the world over.

The clothes are always the same, the 'songs' always equally vacuous and tune-free, the message always aggressive, and the overall ambiance one of anti-society, and lawlessness. 

Smoking Ganga is obligatory, and XL Bullies are optional. This is what certain communities listen to, imitate, and admire! When you see those masked men on their E Bikes whizzing around with earphones on; this is probably what they're listening to.

It certainly ain't Val Doonican.

Sprung

Spring certainly has sprung, UK style. A good mix of 'pleasantly changeable' weather has now greeted us before Summer arrives. Plenty of warm sunshine (16 C yesterday, 19 C today), mowed lawns, and leaves appearing on the trees, all are signs of a welcome change.

Our communal lawns (above) and our private garden (hidden) have been tidied, and a noisy 'dawn chorus' greets us in the early hours. And on sunny days there are plenty of sun-worshippers in the churchyard, bearing their chests (the men, that is).

Our Gardeners, both here and in France, have been busy, and both gardens are neat and tidy. The fruit trees are all filled with flowers, and no doubt 'Summer Dresses' will soon be dusted-down and worn again. In France the front of the house is swathed in Wisteria flowers (below). Sadly we don't get to see the flowers in Spring, but it does flower again in Summer.

There are, of course, new born Lambs in the fields as well. What a wonderful time of year.

 

Product Test

Kimbo had mentioned that he'd bought some frozen Lamb Shanks from Lidl (I think), and that they'd been delicious.

Then, I just happened to notice that they had some in Sainsbury's; so I invested.

Inside the pack were two separate, frozen, vacuum packed, Lamb Shanks in a deep rich gravy.

They needed about 45 mins in the oven, so in went some spuds to roast, then 15 mins later in went the emptied packs of lamb; making sure to keep all the sauce. When the hour was up; they were all perfectly cooked.

We were both very pleasantly surprised. In fact I shall visit Lidl this week to see if they have some; if not I'll buy them again from Sainsbury's. A pack of these in the freezer is an excellent back-up; as it was for me on Easter Day.

The finished dish was impressive looking, very tender and tasty, and no work! If I had one tiny criticism, it would be that the sauce had a slightly artificial mint flavour; but nothing to worry about.

Verdict: 9/10 I shall now keep a pack of these in the freezer at all times.

 

Alaska: Homestead Rescue.

 

Here in the UK there are some minor TV channels that probably have only ONE VIEWER. One such is DMAX; and I think the only viewer is ME!

Some while ago I discovered a programme called 'Alaska: Homestead Rescue'. It's vaguely similar to the UK's DIY SOS, but instead of ordinary householders in need of help, the ones requiring assistance are failing US 'Homesteaders' whose ramshackle woodland cabins are usually no more than falling-down garden sheds, and their 'Homesteads' are more like Junkyards than Farmyards. So, along comes a trio of 'caped-crusaders', who, just like in DIY SOS, promise to make things better in just 7 days.

It has to be said that the majority of 'Homesteaders' around the world, are well organised and successful. But this programme searches-out the most hapless amongst them, for the sake of making 'interesting' viewing.  

I've only seen a few of these programmes, but the lives and lifestyles of these particular featured Homesteaders is rudimentary to say the least. They tend to live off almost nothing, have a few hens, and scatter their collection of scruffy junk and belongings over a wide area. No effort is ever made to create an enclosed Farmyard, where all their barns, animals, and growing areas are protected from the wildlife that lives around them. The very idea of 'Landscaping' seems totally alien to them. When you live in an area that is full of Bears, Cayotes, Wolves, Poisonous Snakes, etc, the first thing anyone would usually do is to create a safe enclosure for themselves, their crops, and their animals. But no......

In many ways I do approve of these people's choice of lifestyle, but NOT of how they go about it. It costs nothing to be tidy, or make your exterior environment as attractive as possible. It might cost a bit to bring-in water, or solar power, or fix the roof, but to live amongst a mess is not the route to a decent standard of living. So they write to Mr Fix-It (Marty Raney, his daughter Misty, and son Matt, above) and they come to help; and, of course, to make a TV programme about themselves.

Frankly, by the time they leave, these Homesteads don't look very different to how they were the week before. They may have a new precarious source of water, a veg' patch, and a few solar panels, but life rarely seems to improve for the residents. In fact the whole TV programme is more of a back-slapping exercise for the Raney family themselves, than for improving the lives of these Homesteaders.

In DIY SOS, the families end-up, after a week, with a completely new, fully-fitted, re-designed, luxury home; but, of course, they do have about 100 volunteer workers.  I think Mr Raney should take a look at a few of their episodes!

A bunch of old hippies with big beards, and a desire to live off the land, is de rigueur in this TV programme. If that 'Lights your Fire' then AHR could be for you! I must say; there's something really nice about seeing people happy to live in tumble-down shacks, even though they're desperate for some running water and a useable loo.

Does 'Homestead' always have to mean 'Ramshackle'?..... I don't see why it should!

Verdict: 3/10 Good for a rainy (Raney?) afternoon siesta.

Cheap white sliced bread

I know what you're thinking; what on earth is Cro doing, buying cheap white sliced bread?

The answer is simple. I've had a jar of Foie Gras sitting at the back of the fridge since before Christmas, and it's time had come. We ate it as an entrée on Good Friday, accompanied by lightly toasted 'white'. 

Toast made with sliced white bread is perfect with Foie Gras, as it doesn't detract from the subtle flavour.

I can't remember the last time I bought cheap white sliced bread, it must have been decades ago.

I had totally forgotten what this stuff tasted like. Here in the UK I'm used to buying seeded wholemeal bread; which actually has a pleasant taste. This white bread has no taste whatsoever. I have never eaten thin sheets of polystyrene, but I imagine this is what it would taste like.

Having said all that, it is perfect with Foie Gras, or Paté, or even topped with St Agur.

I now have 75% of the loaf left-over, so I shall have to find ways of using it. I shall have some toasted with Marmalade, and even some more with a fried egg. I think to eat it for Breakfast would be more suited than at any other time.

I can't see myself finishing it, so the Seagulls will benefit in a few days time.

Would I buy it again? No!

Verdict: 2/10, Awful; but it has its moments!

 

Easter 2026

 

Easter doesn't mean a lot to me, but these FOUR things ARE essential.

1. At our nearby church they always have a Palm Sunday Procession through the churchyard. They sing 'Hosanna', wave Palm fronds, and parade with a couple of Donkeys. It's a lot of nonsense, but it's a tradition right on my very doorstep, so I always attend. The photo above is from last Sunday March 29th; the two Donkeys are sadly just out of shot to the right. 

The procession consisted of the two Donkeys with VERY scruffy 'stable-lad' handlers, four girls dressed in white, and an unknown Bishop (not my neighbour) dressed-up as Santa Claus. He smiled at me in a rather pompous manner; looking as if he was expecting me to throw myself at his feet. The following crowd had handfuls of traditional Palm frond crosses that they were expecting to hand-out to an admiring audience. Unfortunately Lady M, Billy, and myself were the only bystanders!

2. Chocolate: This year, I bought some cute-looking Lindt 'Chicks' (above). And I also bought some Mieszko 'CHERRISSIMO' Polish Liqueur chocolates, and, as you might imagine, they are filled with Cherry Liqueur. Absolutely bloody delicious; they should be available on prescription for all old people like me!

3. Hot Cross Buns (below): Easter wouldn't be Easter without plenty of afternoon toasted Hot Cross Buns, plastered with lots of good quality salted Butter. (Don't buy fancy buns, the ordinary ones are best)

4. Traditionally I roast a Goose on Easter Day itself, but this year we feasted on Friday the 3rd of April (yesterday); this was to accommodate grandsons' availability. There were six of us around the Paschal table, so my 4 kg Goose was perfect (hopefully with a few scraps left over for sandwiches). Goose is certainly amongst my favourite Easter goodies, but they're definitely more carcass than meat. However, the bones make great stock!

That's it. Easter is over for another year. The Donkeys have been returned to their field, and for us it'll be back to ordinary Chocolate, and afternoon Muffins for the next 9 months. Until Mince Pies and Chocolate Santas appear in the shops once again.  

You thought you'd heard it all !!!

 

Are you aware that there is a proud Hard Left Shoplifting Group in the UK, who go by the name of 'Take Back Power'?..... No, nor was I. 

Their sole aim is to steal from shops!

They believe that 'selling for profit' is THEFT, and as they hate THEFT they will THIEVE to show their hatred of THIEVING. Yes; that's how bright they are! Classic Lower IVth Form thinking.

They will steal from any business that makes a profit; they will attack theft with theft. In other words, they will steal from any PROFITABLE BUSINESSES, whether that be from Harrods or Oxfam.

At present they have been stealing from Tesco, Sainsbury, and Morrisons, where they claim to have 'liberated products for redistribution'.

As we ALL know (apart from these idiots), shoplifting has to be paid for, and a £% has to be added to all products to absorb the losses from theft, making everything slightly more expensive for those who obey the law; and DON'T steal (and, of course, for the thieves themselves). The current estimate is that the average UK family pays between £150 and £180 per annum extra to pay for all the theft. No doubt this will now rise. 

What amazes me the most about these dimwitted 'criminals' is that they imagine that they are 'do-gooders'. Modern day Robin Hoods. No, they are simply CRIMINALS, and should be prosecuted.

When STEALING becomes both normalised, and in their eyes almost 'heroic', you know that society has hit rock bottom.

Another group (activated by social media) are the more youthful 'LINK-UP'. They arrange online to gather in a particular spot, then go shoplifting en masse; anything up to 200 at a time. They choose shops such as M & S, then simply raid, steal, and cause chaos. They are all dressed alike (all in black with hoodies and masks), and are mostly teenagers. They are predictably all from a particular community, which I won't mention. This is a frightening new trend that needs to be stamped-out a.s.a.p. 

If both of these groups grow and continue, our high streets could soon be decimated!

The Theft Act of 1968 allows for heavy fines, and up to 7 years in prison for shoplifting. Expect these petty criminals to receive a good 'telling-off' or 'wrist-slapping'; if indeed they get that!

Welcome to the 21st Century UK.

The UK's expensive mistake!

 

One subject is never out of the UK's news; that of Illegal Immigration. THOSE BLOODY BOATS.

Let's get one thing absolutely clear. The French have no interest whatsoever in keeping all their illegals in France. The sooner they can be shot of them the better. This is OBVIOUS to all thinking people.

We have already given about £400 Million to the French to help stop the boats coming here, and we're currently hoping to give them another £2 Million per week for the next two years. Of course the French are very happy to take our money (remember the EU?), and their Gendarmes are happy to shout "No, please don't leave us" as their unwanted immigrants sail north for Blighty (above).

We (the UK) on the other hand, send our boats into the English Channel to pick them up, wrap them in cosy blankets, and taxi them over to Dover where they are then put into nice hotels and looked-after by the taxpayer.

Illegal immigration continues to increase, so WHAT HAVE THE FRENCH DONE WITH ALL OUR MONEY?

THEY are only too happy to be rid of these illegals, and WE seem happy to bring them over here. So why have we been paying them all this cash?

Can anyone from The Labour Party explain? 

The solution is actually very simple. Stop giving France any more money, then when we pick-up the swarthy-sailors mid-channel, turn the boat around and take them STRAIGHT BACK to where they came from (following EU rules)!

Bring back some COMMON SENSE.

p.s. All French Gendarmes carry knives and hand guns, so why couldn't one of them (there are 12 of them in the photo above) have put a hole in the rubber boat? Answer: Because they prefer to see them head for England; and no amount of our money will ever change that!

Plastic Bertrand

How many Belgian singers do you know of? And how many of them have had a huge international SMASH HIT record?

I moved to France in 1972, and five years later there was suddenly ONE SONG that one simply heard everywhere. It seemed to be the biggest hit record that France had ever known!

Belgian singer Plastic Bertrand (Roger Francois Jouret) came from nowhere. Suddenly his hit record 'Ca Plane Pour Moi' (Eng: everything's fine) became the rarest of things; a French international pop-music sensation.

France doesn't normally do 'Pop Music', they don't really understand it. They try, but somehow it never quite works. It always sounds a bit as if the musicians and the singer are reading from different song sheets. La Chanson Francaise is much more their style.

Then along comes the Belgian Mr Plastic, with his 5 chord, monotone, song, and the world goes crazy.

It just goes to show; you should never give up hope!

I still love it. It was the pre-teens anthem for my two older children.

Enjoy (if you can!).

 

Chat GPT

Have you tried asking questions on Chat GPT?

Personally, I haven't. But my son, Kimbo, uses it occasionally. Just recently Lady M found an old George VI 1947 halfpenny coin in the park, and of course Kimbo had to ask all about it.

He sent a photo, and asked Chat GPT if it was worth 'a fortune'; the response was really amazing.

Not only does the reply sound like a real person, but it is filled with so much information that you almost feel lectured-to. It even goes into aspects that weren't asked-about. The answer was so comprehensive, that it was hard to imagine that this wasn't a real (well-informed), live person.

I find it all rather creepy, and almost dangerous. I hear that the current state-of-the-art Chat GPT is only just scraping the surface, and that very soon such AI sites will be more intelligent than most humans; which they probably already are!

If you haven't yet used the site, I suggest you have a go. You will be amazed.

p.s. The battered halfpenny was worth a farthing (at best)!

 

There is some corner of an English garden that is forever growing Vegetables.

This small raised bed was constructed by the Volunteer Gardening Group who (including Lady M) keep The Rest Garden, where I walk with Billy, looking so splendid.

I noticed yesterday morning that, this year, they have planted Rhubarb, Bok Choi, Strawberries, Chives, Rosemary, and a few flowers. There is still space for more. Last year it was covered with self-sown Pumpkins; a few of which I took.

I think this is a wonderful idea. It's a tiny area, so not many of us will benefit from the crops, but those who will (including me again I hope) will be very fortunate.

I saved some seeds from one of last year's better Green Pumpkins, and will sow them in amongst the flowers, etc, nearby. Hopefully some will survive and I'll have some more this Autumn.

One of the few things we lack here in central Brighton is a Communal Vegetable Garden. NOT an 'allotment' as such, but just a small joint veg' growing patch where anyone can participate, and eventually help themselves to what is grown. I'm sure it would be extremely popular!

This raised bed is a miniature version.

 

Totally BONKERS

 

Ignoring the rights and wrongs of the war in Iran, one of the most bizarre sides to the current conflict must be that people are being arrested in the UAE for taking photos of war damage. I see that 70 Brits have been arrested, and face 10 year Jail sentences, for taking photos of bomb damage in Dubai (above).

The authorities claim that it shows their country in a bad light. However, what shows them in an EVEN WORSE LIGHT, is arresting innocent people for telling, and showing, THE TRUTH.

It has to be said (because it's true), that certain cultures really are totally BONKERS.

In The West you might be in trouble for lying, whilst in The Middle East it's the TRUTH that'll get you in very deep poo! Bizarre!

Given Names, then and now.

 

Just prior to upping-sticks and moving to France, I was teaching at the prestigious Prep' School, Windlesham House (above).

Recently I was looking at their Wiki site (to glean some info) and took a look at the list of some of the better known 'old boys'.

Amongst the more recent ones, whose names people might recognise, were Sir Michael Hordern, Duncan Goodhew, Chris Whitty, and Guy Ritchie. All with perfectly normal Christian names.

However, going back a bit, I came across Christian names that were much more adventurous. Imagine naming your son one of these....

Ichabod, Debonnaire, Roden, Saumarez, Lepel, Leveson, Colthurst, Hay, Osmond, Bentley, or Sutton. All more like Surnames than Given Names.

Just like the naming of Dogs, one needs to be able to shout a given name without either you or the Dog/Person feeling embarrassed. The name also needs to be short, sharp, and clear.

Imagine shouting to your son "Debonnaire (or Ichabod), come here; it's lunch time"; rather than "Billy, come here... etc". Whilst giving your sons (and daughters) interesting names, one needs to remember that they should be practical.

There was a recent trend for giving children the names of where they were conceived, so we could have had Bolton Brown, or Frinton-on-Sea Smith, or even Torremolinos Thomas. Not a good trend.

Wines were also popular for a while, and lots of girls were tragically named 'Chardonnay'; we even knew one called 'Chablis'.

So, when you're choosing a name, make sure the poor child won't be constantly embarrassed by shortening it into something obscene, or that it isn't a well-known Italian word for 'Ugly old Cow'. 

Muckle Flugga

 

The UK has some pretty rustic outposts, as well as a few very sophisticated, cosier locations.

One of the former (a lump of offshore rock, with a lighthouse), MUST, at some time or other, have been the subject of a national COMPETITION, to find the most appropriate name for an inhospitable island.

The island, which is part of The Shetlands, off the north coast of Scotland, is just about the most remote and barren place you could imagine, and one has to pity the poor builders who were sent there to build its Lighthouse.

Anyway, someone obviously won the 'Name The Rock Competition', and the lucky winner came up with the very appealing name of MUCKLE FLUGGA. A name, I'm sure you'll agree, that has a certain 'ring' about it.

The name is perfect; I couldn't have thought of anything better. And if you're thinking of holidaying in the area, contact someone who's bound to be called 'Hamish', who keeps the key. Accommodation is free, but you will need to sign a disclaimer against death, frostbite, boredom, and all forms of rock-inflicted injuries. 

I can still hear my mother saying "Cro, if you don't behave yourself, I'll send you to Muckle Fugga". 

"Oh...... NO!

Idyllic England.

This picture (below) is exactly how I remember rural life when I was small. We lived on the edge of a small Surrey Village, and our large garden backed onto open countryside. We also had our own Chickens, Ducks, and Bantams, as well as a large Veg' garden, and plenty of Fruit and Nut trees. So I'm no stranger to bucolic life.

Country life isn't all that different today. The Tractors are definitely bigger, and Hay Bales have changed shape, but otherwise life is much the same. Fields are ploughed, seeds sown, and crops harvested. Cows are still Milked, Pigs fattened, and Sheep sheared. Fields look much as they did over half a century ago, and their surrounding hedges continue to be trimmed. Rooks still nest in noisy gangs high in the Oak trees, and Rabbits run wild amongst the Wheat and Barley. 

One of the few noticeable differences these days is the absence of Haystacks. When I was small, beautifully crafted Haystacks would always be topped with hay-sculpted animals and birds. Pheasants were a favourite. Serious competitions were held for 'Best Haystacks'.

The other major difference is that the Farmers themselves now all have glum faces, but the cause of that is beyond their control.

I would have quite enjoyed life as a Farmer. I did once contemplate buying a farm in Wales It had a lovely old stone farmhouse, loads of stone-built barns, etc, and about 20 acres of good level land. My only problem was that at 25 yeas old, I knew nothing about farming, so I bought a similar stone-built farm in S W France instead, which had just one Hectare of land; not all of which was level.

I grew Wheat and Maize, and I harvested an annual crop of Chestnuts from a small area of ancient grafted trees. And as I had been taught as a child, I grew all my own vegs, and had a run-full of Hens.

Farming runs in my distant family, as I imagine it does in almost everyone's families. I think I would have made a good 'arable' Farmer. No Cows or Sheep or Pigs; just acres of Leeks, Spuds, and Onions.

Now I shall never know. 

 

Joe Lycett.

You'll like this.

Funny AND informative is unusual. But here is comic Joe Lycett offering both.

Enjoy (I did).

 

Maxi-Luddites

 

It doesn't take a genius to understand that all of our Agriculture, and our infrastructure and domestic Construction industries, rely heavily on machinery that use fossil fuels; mostly Diesel. Without that fuel everything would grind to a staggering halt. I have yet to see any Tesla Tractors, Diggers, or Bulldozers around.

Luckily we have plenty of Oil and Gas reserves in The North Sea, but our LUDDITE Minister of Energy Security and Net Zero, the fragrant Ed Milybloodyidiot (above), wants to ban all fossil fuels, and use the light breeze and whatever sunshine we get instead. He refuses to allow our major Oil Co's to drill for our own fuel reserves (of which we have plenty); so we buy from Norway and elsewhere at greatly inflated prices instead. OK, being 99% 'eco' is a pleasantly endearing Woke idea, but we do need to be practical as well.

The most disturbing effect of their Net Zero policies will be on Agriculture. This bizarre government has already caused chaos by stopping farms being handed from Father to Son/Daughter by the imposition of crippling Inheritance Taxes; most farms will now have to be sold to pay huge tax demands. That, and the lack of Diesel Oil for their tractors, will soon bring UK farming to near STANDSTILL. How come that everybody seems to understand this, other than our current bunch of blinkered politicians?

It is no secret that the world's major manufacturers and suppliers of Milifool's beloved Wind turbines and Solar panels are CHINESE. For some strange reason, our politicians prefer to support THEIR economy rather than our own. No wonder that Starmer was visiting China recently. Will we soon be eating Chinese Spuds and Brussels Sprouts?

And it's not only that. The next time you visit your supermarket, take a look at all the parked cars, and see the number that are either Chinese (EV's) or Japanese. Why is it that even our own citizens prefer to support THEIR economies rather than buying European?

All answers on a postcard please to The Luddites of No 10 Downing St, London.

Avian 'des res'.

I am 'now' successfully feeding our local birds (mostly Sparrows) at the front of the house, but I'm having less success at the back.

I installed this very well built and solid bird box about 4 years ago, and although it is in a secure position, it has yet to have any residents. I haven't even seen any birds having a tour of inspection.

It has a good watertight roof, the inside is clean and 'cosy', and it is situated away from prying Cats or Foxes. In other words (to me) it seems ideal for a blossoming family of Blue or Great Tits.

I suppose I could hang a seed-filled feeder nearby to attract them, but that may prove to be counter-productive.

Anyway, I've given it a clean, installed a 'Vacant' sign, and am crossing my fingers.

For heaven's sake; it even has Roses around the door (or it will have). What more could they possibly want!

 

An Essential Change to the Law!

On Saturday morning, I was waiting at a traffic light, when a man pulled-up behind me wearing the EXACT type of large pale-grey hoodie as this woman is wearing below.

Originally I simply thought he looked a bit of a plonker, as it was a lovely warm sunny day. But then I noticed him looking sideways both right and left.

As his head moved, I noticed that the hoodie DIDN'T. Meaning that he couldn't see anything out to either side.

Personally I wouldn't be seen dead wearing a hoodie, let alone wearing one on a warm day in a car. It's no different to a horse wearing blinkers.

So, here is an open letter to Lord Hermer KL, the UK's Attorney General....

"Dear Sir; I would be grateful if you would recommend an immediate ban on the wearing of 'hoodies' by all bike, car, and lorry drivers. It is a danger to other road-users, and other than looking ridiculous, it is also totally unnecessary.  May I also recommend an 'on-the-spot-fine' of £500 (or more). Thank you; Cro".

 

Another Product Test.

My shopping is usually very disciplined; I have my list, and I stick to it.

But occasionally, just occasionally, I throw caution to the winds and invest in a total unknown.

I just happened to be looking for a favourite brand of Choucroute, when I noticed this (below). Spichlerz Rusiecki Miesiwo (I hope I've spelt that correctly).

It didn't really give many clues as to what it was, but it did claim to be 'Dish of meat au jus'; I was intrigued.

I thought it must be Polish, and be made of Pork. It looked rather like the Jamboneau I buy in France, with a solid looking lump of meat surrounded by jelly. But I wasn't sure if it was a type of paté, or a mixture of paté and meat, or even a solid piece of preserved meat. It didn't say, and I couldn't see!

In fact it was solid meat (not minced), and was probably made-up from several pieces. It WAS very similar to the French Jamboneau, but maybe not quite as tasty.

I found it amongst the foreign foods at Sainsbury's, but I don't know if it's sold everywhere. I'm sure most bigger stores would have it. Online it was advertised at £2.38 from Asda, £2.50 from Sainsbury's (which is what I paid), and £4.26 + £19.99 delivery from londongrocery.net (they must be bloody kidding!).

It was certainly worth buying; I enjoyed it, and it wasn't over expensive. If you like that sort of thing I would recommend that you give it a go. Serve with buttered toast and a few gherkins!

Verdict: 8/10. It could be better seasoned, but otherwise very pleasant. I shall certainly buy it again.

Harry Hill

Harry Hill isn't on TV much these days, but he was always amongst my very favourite comedians.

I once went to a show of his at The Theatre Royal here in Brighton; it was without doubt the funniest evening of my life.

This very short video comes from his TV show 'TV Burp'. A classic of the style of clips he showed.

One of my real hates, is people who don't speak clearly. Mumbling has become 'fashionable' (especially amongst actors); so here are some good examples. Enjoy!

And don't ask me what they're saying (except for the final one) because I don't have a clue.

 

Strachey, Bloomsbury, and Charleston.

Of all my literary heroes from the past, I haven't heard the name of Lytton Strachey mentioned for quite some while. Maybe he is simply 'out of fashion'; if indeed he was ever 'in'.

I first came upon him whilst still at school. I was doing a project about the role of Florence Nightingale in world medicine, and discovered his book 'Eminent Victorians' (in which she featured). Strachey's writing, and highly individual perspective, made him appeal at once.

These days I associate Strachey with Charleston; the Bloomsbury group home on the other side of The Downs from Brighton. Strachey didn't actually live there but was a frequent visitor to Duncan Grant, Vanessa Bell, and others. This portrait of LS (below) is by Dora Carrington.

Much later I bought Michael Holroyd's rather heavy-going biography of Strachey, which I still have; and occasionally browse.

In many ways LS was a man of 'fringe importance'. He appealed to a specific audience, and his critical writings only appeared in 'fringe publications'. Regardless, there is something essentially 'English' about his writing. Very 'Bloomsbury'.

LS lived in Wiltshire, at Ham Spray House, near Marlborough (below). The photo shows L to R Carrington, Frank Partridge, and LS himself.

I think Strachey is now ripe for a revival. A BBC biopic maybe. Or even a Bloomsbury Romcom? I would, of course, play the part of scruffy painter Duncan Grant.

This (below) is me back in 2022 in France, reading a letter from Virginia Nicholson (co-author of the ultimate Charleston book I'm holding). She had written the book with her father Quentin Bell (son of Clive and Vanessa Bell), but he sadly died just before its publication. She wrote to me "From one of the authors, and in memory of the other, best wishes, etc". The book, and her kind letter, is one of my treasured possessions.

The Bloomsbury Group were certainly people about whom there is plenty of scandalous subject matter. It would make 'essential' viewing (Channel 4 maybe?).

Mojtaba Khamenei

 

Regular visitors here may remember that I wrote about Mojtaba Khamenei (above) back on 3rd Feb this year.

He's a charming fellow. Son of the late supreme leader (now with his 72 virgins), he had access to unlimited funds to amuse himself, wherever he fancied; mostly in London. I see that his late father, the fragrant Ayatollah, managed to amass a 'fortune' of between $95 and $200 Billion. All this whilst many of his people could hardly afford a loaf of bread.

It must be strange to have access to unlimited money. If he sees a £40 Million house that he fancies, he just says "Send the bill to Iran", and it's his! And he moves on to the next one.

The big question is (as with so many Islamic leaders), where does all the money come from?

Arafat was the first leader I'd heard about who 'commandeered' vast amounts of his people's money. Since then almost every Hamas senior figure has managed to acquire a few dodgy £Millions or even £Billions; Yahya Sinwar having even deposited his stash in a Jewish Bank in Tel Aviv. The bloody cheek! 

It's well known that these people steal money that belongs to the citizens of Iran, Syria, Gaza, etc, and they have no shame in doing so.

The latest I heard of Mojtaba himself, was that he MIGHT have lost a limb, and MIGHT be in a coma. News is sketchy. As with most of these people; their stolen £Billions don't do them much good! You can only spend so much.

Mojtaba is of course a Cleric, like his father before him; but does The Koran not teach that one 'Should not steal'? Surely a Cleric should know better. 

Wine from The Red Sea.

 

I've drunk wine from many parts of the world.

France, Spain, Italy, Germany, Australia, the USA, Argentina, Greece, Chile, Peru, Portugal, Morocco, S Africa, and a few other places that I've probably forgotten. But I'd never tasted an Egyptian wine.

With Kimbo and Suzie just back from their short jaunt in Egypt, I was presented with a bottle of 'Shahrazade' Cabernet/Merlot wine. 

On the back label it promises that the wine is 'Rich with the blessings of the ancient Nile terraces'; whatever that means.

It's a light red at 12.5% alc, and offers 'A flavour of red berries and spices, mingled with jammy ripe fruits; complimented by silky smooth tannins'.

As you know, I do like to assess new tastes and flavours, so I put on my sommelier's hat, and went to work.

Verdict: 2/10 (they lied)

If you have always wondered why Egyptian Wine isn't more popular; I suggest you try 'Shahrazade'.

Jack Hargreaves

Many people these days will NOT know the name Jack Hargreaves, but when I was a wee Whipper-Snapper he was one of my great heroes.

He had a TV programme called 'Out of Town', where he sat in a garden shed, and talked about all things bucolic. It was one of those very relaxed programmes that taught you so much, without really trying.

He didn't dress-up, he sucked on an old pipe, spoke with a country drawl, and he fiddled with bits of string. He was the epitome of an easy-going countryman. Here he is driving his Horse and Trap; not unlike the one we had as children in my native Surrey village of Lingfield.

Many years later, here I am (in about 1975) outside my original Farmhouse in S W France (below), driving a very similar Horse and Trap.

The Trap was mine, but the Horse (Joe) belonged to some friends who were visiting in an old Gypsy Caravan. They were travelling from the North to the South of France; an eco-trip.

When our friends reached the South Coast of France, after SIX months on the road, they sold both Horse and Caravan. If I'd known they were going to sell, I would have made an offer.

The Caravan had been bought in Ireland, and was of the type knows as 'An Open Lot', the Horse came from London, and had been working as a Rag-n-Bone-Man's Horse. He was a Welsh Cob, and behaved perfectly.

This below is the Caravan that Joe pulled, with me and our first two small children. Jack Hargreaves would have approved!

Still proclaiming.

I recently heard this song being used as the backing for some BBC Radio play (I can't remember what it was).

The Proclaimers were a strange phenomenon on the music scene. Scottish twin brothers, Craig and Charlie Reid from Auchtermuchty, sand alluringly old fashioned songs that became huge hits. Their songs 'Letter from America', and 'I'm gonna be' (I would walk 500 miles), took them to the top of the UK charts.  

This particular song 'Beautiful truth' is amongst their best. A beautiful relaxing melody.

 

The Cancelling of a National Hero

It's a sad day. Churchill's portrait is to be removed from our £5 banknotes. Instead we are to have some more acceptable cute cuddly Woke animals.

They (?) are chipping away, and airbrushing our history, bit by bit. They topple statues, detest Remembrance Day Poppies, ban certain history books, throw their hands in horror at any mention of 'Empire', spray over important monuments, and re-name offending streets; all in the name of Woke-ism. 

Most countries celebrate and cherish their history, but not us. The heroic past of our nation, our greatest achievements, and our history, is being slowly 'cancelled'. Our current crop of Woke Lovies see much of Britain's past as unacceptable, and they work hard to remove anything that offends their Woke credentials.

Anyway, there's nothing we can do about it. We have to accept what they do without complaining. We are powerless, and must wait for a different government with more backbone to reverse matters.

However, just for fun, I'm showing this delightful photo again (below) of a very young Lady Magnon (bottom left) sitting patiently listening to Winston Churchill at our Embassy in Washington. The great man will NEVER be whitewashed in this house!

Making it someone else's problem!

I don't get into town much these days even though the main shopping area is only a few hundred yards away. Brighton is also quite 'hilly', which I find a problem. It's easier for me to go out of town by car, and do all I need there!

As such I don't see much of any homelessness there may be, although I have mentioned previously about a few people who lived in tents in the Park.

However, having seen this headline (above) in my Msn News Feed, I am presuming that there is still a problem. Usually at this cold time of year, the 'homeless' stay at home; one is more likely to see them in Summer when the weather is better.

Unlike our Government who dither over everything (except raising taxes), our Labour Council is grasping the nettle, and dealing with the 'homelessness' problem by sending Brighton's nomads over to Eastbourne; known everywhere as 'God's Waiting Room'.  

I'm not sure what the elderly population of Eastbourne will make of this. They are used to their quiet, uneventful, OAP-filled, seaside town; NOT having a bunch of drugged-up scruffy individuals, sitting on the pavements with their hands out.

No doubt they'll soon all walk back along the coast to the town they love, and which offers them a much more pleasant lifestyle.

Good try Council, but don't start celebrating too soon.

 

DRUGS

I'm not a drug user, and never have been. As an Art Student, in the late 60's, I did once smoke some Hashish, but it sent me to sleep, so I didn't bother again.

On my early dog-walk yesterday morning, I noticed a small, suspicious looking, plastic bag on the ground in the Twitten behind my garage; an area often used by local crack-heads. It was a small plastic Ziploc packet that contained a number of even smaller packs. It looked very suspicious, so I picked it up (not wanting any small children to find it), and took it home.

Above, is what it contained. About a dozen very small packets containing white powder.

I have no idea what it is, and have no desire to find out. I presume it is either Fentanyl or Cocaine or something similar.

So, what does one do with such a find? I don't know if the Police will be interested, and I don't want to dispose of it in it's present condition. Do I flush it down the loo? Do I incinerate it? Do I bury it in the garden?

Some dealer must be as 'Sick as a Parrot' this morning, and no doubt he'll be seen scouring the area, over the next few days!

Now I have to decide what I'll do with it.

(Some time later). I contacted the Police, and in no time a couple of very attractive and friendly young female PC's knocked at the door, and the offending stupefiants were taken into custody. They seemed very grateful.

Do not be surprised if my name appears in King Charles's Birthday Honours List, for services to the community above and beyond the call of duty. Cro Magnon OBE.

Never a dull moment !!!

Product Test.

I fancied some Fish Fingers for supper, but there were only TWO left in my freezer. Not enough!

Inside the freezer cabinet at Sainsbury's there were two very similar looking packets, which I'd not noticed before. One was for Cod Fish Fingers (the type I had at home), and the other was for Pollock (which I'd never previously tried). They could easily have been confused.

As I'd heard Rick Stein going on about how we should all be buying Pollock rather than Cod (to save Cod fish stocks), I plumped for the Pollock, which were also considerably cheaper; I think less than half the price.

I fried them in the same pan, but kept them apart. As above; the Cod was on the left and the Pollock on the right.

Frankly, taste-wise, I could hardly tell them apart, I had to really concentrate on finding any difference. If anything, I found the Cod to be very slightly 'sweeter', but overall they were much the same. Both very nice.

I served them with some simply fried 'Little Gem' lettuce.

Verdict: Pollock Fish Fingers, 10/10. I shall certainly be buying them in future! 

I'll leave the Cod to swim another day.

 

Starmer in the poo again.

 

Poor old Starmer, I'm almost beginning to feel sorry for him. Whatever he does; he gets wrong.

Tru*p isn't happy with him; nor is Tony Blair. He's being attacked from all sides; even his own!

The US President recently said "We'll never forget the lack of support, from a once great ally". He also told Starmer not to bother with his little warship as the war was almost over! Macron has now helped-out in Cyprus instead. The French President told the residents of Cyprus that if they couldn't rely on the UK, they could always rely on France.

Rule Britannia, Britannia rules the waves..... Sadly not any more under Starmer. We are now a piss-poor naval nation!

Blair also rebuked him for not having backed the US right from the very beginning.

Of course, with such a huge Muslim population in the UK (who I expect are Labour voters) he doesn't wish to rock the boat. I'm sure both Churchill and Mrs T would never have considered such trivialities; but elections are looming, and he needs EVERY vote.!

This dreadful inditement of UK defence policy comes just as The Army holds a referendum about the wearing of makeup and hairstyles amongst the rank and file. With their new 'Woke' policy on 'gender', they are asking ordinary soldiers if they think they should be allowed to wear makeup and have their hair permed. I have yet to hear the results.

Shadow defence minister, Mark Francois noted "Replacing facial camouflage with mascara will hardly deter Putin". Well said MF! 

I believe that Starmer has now phoned Tru*p to apologise, and to attempt to repair the damage he's caused to the UK. Some bloody hope!

As further response to the Iran war, Starmer is to strengthen laws concerning 'Hostility towards Muslims'. They will create laws against 'Prejudicial Stereotyping', and general 'Disrespect'. It looks as if the pro-Hamas lobby has won yet again. I shall obviously need to be more cautious in the future, of what I say about terrorist groups. 

Oh dear oh dear. 'Will no-one rid us of this turbulent lawyer'???

p.s. I see that our little boat has now left harbour, and is heading for The Med'.

So, how's it going?

 

The new Green Waste bins system (that I was slightly dubious about) is now in operation, so I thought I'd have a look inside my nearest one.

It's been 10 days since they were 'open for use', and I suspect that, just like the nice little plastic boxes that were delivered to every home, the system is being ignored.

I have just looked inside my nearest bin, and there was NOTHING inside, not even the vestige of a rotting lettuce leaf. Rien de tout!

It's not that people here are anti composting or methane-ing. Most people, like Lady M, are very conscientious about recycling, etc. It's just that this is a recycle-too-far, and people can't be bothered.

We already have to sort through all our rubbish, and picking out that cabbage leaf or potato peel is just too much.

Maybe in time they WILL be used, but for the moment they remain unloved. I'm even wondering if the interior stainless steel bins won't soon attract the 'light-fingered' brigade, and they disappear just to end-up in people's gardens (not that I'm suggesting such a thing).