The week's news you may have missed.

 

Andrew Gwynne MP (Socialist) has been given the boot. When asked by a constituent about the poor standard of rubbish collection, this non-Labour voter was told "Dear Resident. Fuck your bins. I'm re-elected and without your vote. Screw you", he then continued by saying he hoped his 'constituent' would die. Another (Socialist) MP, Oliver Ryan was his sidekick in a series of horrible antisemitic, sexist, and homophobic exchanges on WhatsApp. No doubt Ryan will have his bottom smacked too. What a disgusting couple of charmers. Labour's sobriquet of 'The Nasty Party' is certainly warranted.  Gwynne was part of Corbyn's short-lived shadow cabinet; which explains a lot. The BBC tells us that both men have now apologised. Well, like everyone else, I find that a tad too late. When asked about the scandal, Angela Eagle (Socialist) MP (yes, her) said "Anyone can make a mistake". Further investigations have continued into those nasty WhatsApp messages, and another 11 Socialist councilors have now been suspended from the party.

Harry and Meghan (remember them?) have been called many things since her tantrum caused their exile; most of which are unrepeatable. One of the earliest favourites was 'Ginge and Whinge'. Then came 'The Kardashians of Windsor', and  'Wonderboy and Wondergirl'. Meghan herself has been called 'Me-Gain', 'Duchess Difficult', and 'MeMeMeghan'. Whilst Harry was named after the TV comedy character 'Tim nice but dim'. I believe that the fragrant Meghan has recently been referred-to as 'Terrible' by a well-known US politician. Any further suggestions would be welcome.

Another mixture of politics and rubbish collection has also recently surfaced. In many Socialist run cities, the lack of rubbish collection is causing huge infestations of RATS. I hear that in Birmingham (below) and Southampton people are afraid to open their doors in case rats should run in and take-over. A tad exaggerated methinks, but rats are never pleasant; even of the animal kind.

The UK courts made two interesting decisions this week. Firstly an Albanian criminal escaped deportation because of his son's love of English 'Chicken Nuggets', and a Pakistani paedophile also escaped deportation because it might 'upset his children'. Well done those Judges; I hope they pay you well. 

The latest 'country folk' to be harassed are Shotgun owners. They really don't like the 'Huntin' and Shootin' fraternity (Fishin' is OK, as it's a lower class sport), and they wish to reduce shotgun ownership. That weekend shooting party on Lord Snooty's Cotswold estate may well soon become a thing of the past, with another few thousands unemployed.

This may well be the most important news of the century; but don't hold your breath. Boffins in Oxford have just achieved a basic form of teleportation. We're on the way to instant travel. Press a button and you could be in New York, Sydney, or Paris in an instant. (I'll believe that when I experience it)

Some good news you may have missed. The UK government has stated that any immigrant arriving illegally will NEVER be allowed citizenship. Well said!!! I didn't think I'd ever support anything from this government, but at last some real common sense!

And finally, the fragrant Rachel Reeves is under investigation again. Previously it was her CV, this time it's her expenses whilst working for HBOS. I never thought I'd be on the side of Ms Reeves, but in this case I am. It's a load of nonsensical muck-raking that serves absolutely no purpose.