Lucky Bast*rd

 

Yesterday was the day for my car's (Debi) annual Service, Wash, and MOT.

I had left her with the garage at 8 am, and was advised to collect her at around 5 pm.

At about 4.45 pm I ordered my return taxi, and we set off for the garage. We had hardly gone 20 metres, when the taxi driver pulled-up sharply, jumped out of the car, and ran round to the front.

I wondered what the heck he was up to.

He came back to the car holding a big 'wadge' of bank notes. He had spied them from a distance, and he wasn't going to leave them lying there. There must have been hundreds of £'s; if not thousands (probably drug money).

With his new-found wealth, I was half expecting him to offer me the taxi-ride free of charge; but no, it cost me £20.

Above shows Debi: Serviced, Motted, and Washed. She's now ready for all that life can throw at her.

Look how clean she is! Boootiful.

Precious Keys

Like most people, I dread the idea of losing my keys.

My French house keys are securely guarded. I protect them with my life. They are NEVER away from their place of safe-keeping. Touch them, and you die!

So, it was with much soul-searching that I reluctantly handed over TWO of them to Kimbo, who will pop over for a short stay in a week or so. I put them on a big yellow tag, and he's bolted them to his own house keys.

This (below) is official proof of my handing them over. 

Whilst at the cottage Kimbo suggested that he would like to mow the lawns, and he needed the key to Rory (the mower), and to Rory's Garage.

As you can imagine, I was very hesitant to part with my keys; but he had me in an arm-lock, and I was forced to hand them over.

The problem now is 'Will I ever see them again'? He has been given a very stern warning about looking after them, and where to leave them when he returns.

Last year I entrusted my keys (against my better judgement) to a person who I know very well. She lost them, and I was forced to take an angle-grinder to several padlocks. Never again.

We took the above photo as definitive PROOF that they were handed over.

I shall now be a bag of nerves until we are reunited.

 

Fun at the expense of.......

I've always liked political cartoons; of ALL political persuasions.

I thought this one (below) was particularly good. It was originally entitled 'Wally and Vomit', but is, of course, of our fragrant Prime Minister Keir Starmer and his deputy PM David Lammy. Superb. 

If you are English, or know anything about English politics, you will appreciate what a wonderful portrayal it is.

It has nothing to do with their politics, or even their party allegiances, it is simply a superb bit of comedy, in the tradition of Gillray, Rowlandson, or even Ronald Searle.

Every time I look at it, it makes me laugh (with apologies to anyone who voted for them).

 

Confit de Canard

I'm sure you already know, but Confit de Canard is simply preserved Duck.

It is usually made from Ducks that were fattened for the making of Foie Gras, and the legs and thighs were later preserved in their own fat (of which there was lots). The pieces of Duck are placed in large copper pans, covered with Duck Fat, then gently simmered for a few hours, before being placed in large earthenware 'crocks' and covered with the fat. Like this, the Confit would keep for a long time.

These two frozen Duck Legs, in a vacuum pack (below), were bought at Aldi for £2.99. It was sold as 'Duck a l'Orange', and comes with a separate pack of Orange flavoured sauce. The sauce is best kept for another recipe (I used it for a sweet-n-sour Pork dish), and the legs roasted as one would any other Confit. 

Confit de Canard is usually very expensive, so you can imagine my delight at finding these at Aldi. OK, they come from China and not from France, but I'm not complaining. They taste pretty much the same.

I served them with some roasted small Jersey Royal Potatoes (superb), and a bit of Greenery.

I'm allowing my freezer to empty itself bit by bit at the moment, but when we return from France in September, I shall make sure that there are several packs in there.

If you search for Confit de Canard online, you will see how expensive it normally is. These are just £1.50 per person/serving.

Verdict: 8/10. It doesn't have the intensity of French Confit, but it comes very close.

N.B. I DO NOT work for Aldi, nor am I a shareholder. I am simply a new devotee. I keep discovering new and exciting things. May that continue !!!

Bolt-hole

It seems a very long time ago since I bought this cottage (1978-ish?). At the time it was just a one room, derelict, roofless, floorless, ancient stone built cottage, in need of TOTAL restoration.

It's about 300 years old, and looks-out over perfectly tranquil agricultural land, and untroubled woods. When I first looked inside, I discovered a lovely old fireplace and a carved stone sink, I knew I had to have it. The first family to have lived there, would have done so under the reign of Louis XV.

We lived about 300 metres away, at the time, in a big old farmhouse, and the tiny ruin was owned by my next door neighbours. We had a chat over a glass of Pastis, and a deal was done.

It didn't cost me a lot, but since then I'd hate to think how much I've spent on bringing it to the comfortable state it's in today. If you close your eyes and picture an ideal French country cottage, this is probably what it would look like.

I've lived in big houses, tiny broom-cupboard-sized flats, and that extensive French farmstead, but nothing has been as pleasant to live-in as this little cottage. It has a warm, friendly, atmosphere, that cannot be created or 'designed'. As soon as we step inside, it gives us a huge hug!

Since buying the house we have added-on at one end, brought-in water and electricity, built our 'tower', installed the pool, bought more land, built a covered terrace, planted fruit trees, established Haddock's (our now-no-longer-used veg' garden), and made the house comfortable, whilst keeping its rusticity. This (below) is our sitting/dining room.

Almost everything we've done to the cottage has involved local craftsmen, and artisans. Hand made floor-tiles in the house and tower, timber cut specially at a local sawmill for most of our building work, and beautiful hand-made peg-tiles for the tower roof. As much as possible I've tried to make the cottage feel as it would have centuries ago (other than the water and electricity). 

This year I intend to put a hand-rail on the stairs (I'm getting doddery), and plant a few more Peach trees. After that I think I'll leave it to others; I feel that I've done my bit!

More Seagulls

I expect that all coastal-dwellers have the same love/hate relationship with their Seagulls as I do.

They are very beautiful birds, but they are also aggressive. They steal chips from the hands of al fresco tourist diners, and will swoop down on almost anyone who they take a dislike to. They tease Billy too!

This one above was very friendly yesterday morning. Someone had put some (what looked like) dog croquettes on top of the tomb, and he/she was scoffing the lot!

I've painted Gulls on numerous occasions; they featured often in my work. This simple sketch below I could have sold several times over. I was even encouraged to make it into a Postcard for the town's seaside tourist shops. Not really my thing!

 

I think we have a Seagull nesting on the roof. We can hear Seagull-style rave-parties going on at night. My neighbour has some scaffolding up at the moment, so I'll ask him to have a look. I probably wouldn't ask them to move on, but it would be nice to know.

The Three (or more) Stooges.

As expected, Starmer will go. It's just a miracle that he's lasted so long.

There seems to be three main candidates who are eager to replace him.

Andy Burnham (known as The King of the North) is presently The Mayor of Greater Manchester. He is popular for being popular. Now all he needs is to find a parliamentary seat, which may prove more tricky than he thinks with Uncle Nigel's boy against him. Hmmmm.

The adorable Angela Rayner (above with Burnham) is a firebrand. Her background is best forgotten, as is her small £800,000 Brighton second-home flat. She seems to have got away with dodging £40,000 of the £70,000 Stamp Duty on its purchase; although I believe she has since paid-up. Many will remember that the fragrant Angela had to resign over the scandal. Politically she comes from the same mould as Comrade Corbyn.

And thirdly there's cheeky-chappie little Wes Streeting (above with Mandy). His grandfather, Bill, was a career criminal, and friend of the Kray Brothers, who spent a lot of time in prison. His grandmother, who aided and abetted her husband, was also imprisoned, and gave birth to Wes's mother (in handcuffs) whilst in Holloway; where she had shared a cell with Christine Keeler. 

So, take your pick. I doubt if any of them will undo the damage done by Starmer and Co, but as long as they don't make matters worse we shall have to tolerate one of them for a while.

Verdict: 

Burnham, probably the best of a poor bunch. 4½/10

Rayner, the 'party gal' with history. Late nights, beer, and Corbyn style lunacy. 2/10

Streeting, a twinkle-eyed wet rag. 0/10

p.s. Of course there COULD BE a 4th contestant. How about Wes and Starmer's chum Lord 'Mandy' Mandelson throwing his hat into the ring?